Love Arranged (#1)

Chapter Fifty-Two

Chapter Fifty-Two: Maggie

I've been called someone's girlfriend before. It isn't really a label I'm not familiar with.

But why does being called Evan Williams's girlfriend feel like a whole new experience? Something that I feel like I've just begun to fully embrace and come to terms with?

I've been in a relationship before, I know what it's like to be someone's girlfriend, to have a boyfriend, and to have people see me and said boyfriend do boyfriend and girlfriend things.

I know what it feels like to have people say that my boyfriend and I are cute together, have them watch us from a distance, and talk about us being a couple which I set aside because at the end of the day, what really matters is my relationship with said boyfriend.

But with Evan, that's not the case.

With Evan, it feels like I've earned a new sense of disorientation. As if I'm doing this all over again even though I already did with Levi. As if I've lost my sense of direction of how these things typically work, which is confusing because it hasn't been that long since I've been in my last relationship.

I guess it's because with Levi we were so similar that there was no need to think about what other people thought about us because, me and him together? It just made sense.

Me and Evan, however? It's a vague combination that no one, not even myself, would've expected.

I was completely stepping into his world now, even though I already did the second we got engaged, but this time with a role I never would've thought I'd become. His girlfriend.

Ironic, I know. But you get the gist of it.

Like me being Evan Williams's enemy? That made sense. Me being Evan Williams's fake fiance? Heck, that made much more sense, but me being Evan Williams's girlfriend?

It's like seeing a fussy cat getting cozied up alongside a slobbering dog, it wouldn't be impossible, but still, it's a weird sight to see.

Plus hasn't that always been our dynamic? Barking and hissing at each other like cats and dogs and chasing each other around as if our lives depended on harassing each other.

Yet here we are now, not only having found common ground but actually... dating.

I was kinda preparing myself for this, with me getting used to Evan picking me up at my house to go to school, and us exchanging suggestive glances during class and being intimate.

But it felt weird then, and it most certainly still feels weird now.

But as I said to Evan during our first date, that just because it feels odd doesn't mean it's a bad thing, it just means that I'm still getting used to the idea of us being together. Plus, having something different can be better than sticking to what you know and what's been done before.

If anything, I should be concerned that by dating Evan I'll still feel as if nothing's changed, and like I'm dating Levi all over again and God forbid I'd fall into that pattern.

So even though as much as this relationship feels otherworldly and something I'm not familiar with, I like that it makes me feel like I'm experiencing something new all over again, and isn't that what we all want deep down?

To meet someone who'll make us feel a whole new sensation of what it means to be loved but in a way that we're not typically used to? Something foreign but liberating?

Because you know it was the kind of love you were secretly searching for deep down?

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