Pack [Eddsworld]

CHAPTER FOUR

Sneaking through the back streets of London was easy. No one ever suspects the two drunk lesbians of being one of the world's most wanted leaders of an army and his highly-trained bodyguard.

The only people who were awake at this hour were those leaving bars, those in shady gangs, and those who were both: Tord and Ylva. They stumbled out the doorway, blending in perfectly with the crowds of drunks who had also been kicked out at closing time. Tord wasn't quite able to make eye contact with her after an incident that occurred inside.

Dim lights glimmered on glasses and bottles. Men and women of all ages and ethnicities were enjoying themselves inside the bar. A group of young males were playing darts in one corner, cheering and jeering loudly with every shot. Round tables were placed in an orderly fashion around the small space, some empty but others with people sitting at them on uncomfortable wooden chairs.

Ylva and Tord stood at the front, leaning on the bar counter next to some stools. As was typical for him, he was smoking a cigar, still not quite used to seeing his nails being bright red. She was running her finger around the top of her martini glass, her elbows resting on the counter on either side.

A man wobbled up to Tord, causing him to turn around and face the stranger with a raised eyebrow.

"Hey, baby, did you fall from heaven?" He grinned at the 'girl', winking and reaching around with the intention of grabbing Tord's bum.

Before Red Leader had any time to react, Ylva had already grabbed the stranger's wrist and twisted his arm back behind him, causing him to yelp. She released him before she attracted any attention and slung her arm over Tord's shoulders.

The man straightened up again, furious, and grabbing his shoulder tightly. "What the hell was that for, bi-"

"Sorry, sweetie, she's already taken." Ylva flashed a swift smile, moving her hands up to Tord's cheeks and pressing their lips together in a sudden kiss.

"Ugh, lesbians again..." And with that, the stranger melted back into the crowds a little dejectedly.

Ylva pulled away and wiped her lips with the back of her gloved hand, smoothly turning back to her drink as if nothing had ever happened. Tord had a dazed expression playing on his features, his mouth ajar and his cigar forgotten between his fingers.

He shrugged away the embarrassment at the memory and followed Ylva down a dark side alley. Both of them were still on high alert, despite having a couple of drinks. The street grew brighter and opened up into a completely different area; they froze in their footsteps and flattened themselves against the wall. Tord peeked around the corner, blinking to help his eyes adjust to the sudden light.

The first person he saw was a man clad in all black. His trousers were loose and had a flame pattern licking its way up from the bottom. Half of his face was covered by a piece of fire-patterned cloth and his skin was quite pale. He had small, beady eyes and hollow cheekbones; his head had been shaved bald and there were tattoos of fire crawling around his ears and down his jawbone like a bizarre beard.

"Any news of Red Leader?" A male voice, not belonging to this individual, growled; Tord daren't peer any further around for fear of being caught.

Fire-guy dipped his head slightly. "It seems like he's gone off the radar. It may be possible that he has caught wind of our plans-?"

"You mean to say that there's a rat in our midst?" His accented tone grew gravelly, filled with growing anger.

"Ah- no, sir! I don't believe so!" The reporter's head suddenly snapped towards the alleyway where they were hiding; Tord whipped out of sight, holding his breath and closing his eyes. "But... maybe we should pick a more secret location next time?"

"Naturally. However, check the ranks just in case. We can't have any more information leaked to tip off Red Leader." There was a moment of tense silence. "Very well. You are dismissed."

Footsteps faded away. It a took a moment for Tord's pulse to slow down again. It took another moment for him to realise that another set of footsteps were heading directly towards them.

Panicking, Tord looked around him for anywhere the two of them could hide, but there was nothing. Deciding it was better than nothing, he hopped in front of a surprised Ylva.

"Sorry about this," he whispered in her ear before pressing their bodies together, pushing his mouth against hers to silence her squeak of shock.

Fire-guy turned the corner, a shout ready on his tongue. "What are you punks doing here?"

Tord pulled away from a grinning Ylva, placing one hand on the wall next to her head and using the other to tuck a few loose strands of his hair behind his ear. "Sorry, sweetie." He giggled lightly, pulling off the feminine voice with surprising ease.

"C'mon, Tori, let's go somewhere more private." Ylva took Tord's hand with a airy laugh, dragging him from the alleyway in a slight skip.

They emerged back in the main street with loud sighs of relief. The man obviously wasn't suspicious enough to follow them as they fled. A couple of cars drove by as the pair started to trudge down the street, heading back towards Edd's house. Almost all of the shops were closed, although there was still one with a window full of TVs, all displayed an advert for Bacon Cola. Tord glanced sideways at it as they passed in silence, reminding himself that this was what life was like for many people: no guns nor gangs.

"Did you see who that guy was talking to?" Ylva looked at him, barely noticing the wistful expression he quickly wiped. "He sounded like the leader."

"No, he was too far around. I only saw the guy who walked in on us kis- ah, sorry about that, by the way." He was partially expecting her to slap him, his face already tensed up in preparation.

"Don't worry about it. That makes us even again." She winked at him. "Besides, it's a rather enjoyable act to distract them."

He turned his head away from her, focusing on not blushing. "Don't get used to it, sweetheart."

"Why not, Tordie?" She teased, making the most of his moment of weakness. "The guys think we're married; they're going to expect kissing at some point or another."

"Slå opp, soldat." He looked up from the pavement to see the path leading to the front door of their house. (Shut up, soldier.)

"Selvfølgelig, herr." She pursed her lips and watched as he scaled the side of the building, tumbling back inside Matt's bedroom. (Of course, sir.)

The golden glow of dawn was rising on the horizon as they rolled back into bed, exhausted from an unusual night out.

~

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