I stood there studying my dad as time ceased to exist. His hair was unruly with gray strands peaking through his pitched black hair. His goatee was dark and he flashed a smile that made my heart drop...my dad is here, actually here....
"Daddy!" My eyes flooded with tears as I wrapped him in a tight hug.
"Savy girl. You've grown so much!" He released me then held me at arm's length and pulled me into his embrace again. He planted a kiss on my forehead.
"Look at you...you've grown so well." he wiped away my tears and stroked my hair.
"Savannah?" mom yelled in the distance. Her shoes clicked against the floor as her footsteps approached.
"Sava...Clifford?" Just by saying dads name, I could tell how afraid mom was. She grabbed me at my forearm and pulled me back from dad.
"It would be best if you left, Clifford." I turned back to see the fear in her eyes.
"Mom, please?" I stood between my parents as they had a stare down, if looks could kill...
"Savannah, get in here right now!" Mom demanded.
"Clifford, if you don't leave right now, I'll have the police escort you off my property." She arched an eyebrow at dad.
"I have a panic button, right here." She pointed to wall.
"Mom, what? You have a panic button? He doesn't want to hurt us." saying those words out loud felt too painful, my eyes sprung full of tears.
"I'd hate to walk through this family reunion but I need to get inside." Josie barked. Dads head snapped back and he met eyes with an infuriated Josie.
"Jos?" He whispered surprised. As he wanted to touch her she slapped his hand down.
"Don't touch me, Clifford."
"Savy, it would be best if I left -"he shrugged
"No, dad you're not going anywhere." Josie narrowed her eyes at me
"Dad? Really Savannah. You're being delusional, he couldn't own up to that name even if he got paid to do so. Clifford, please leave my mother's property you are not welcome here." Josie pushed pass dad and slammed the door shut.
********
Mom, Josie and I were standing in the foyer.
"Was that really necessary?" I glanced at either of them in menace then turned to the door and swung it open. I was relieved to find dad strolling away from the house.
"Dad, wait" I yelled as a ran towards him.
"I'm sorry about what just happened." I shrugged. Not really knowing if I was because I understood both, my mom and sisters anger.
"It's okay, Savy-girl. I've caused you guys so much pain. I don't want to justify my actions from those years. I want to mend what I broke. But, they are full of built up anger and I don't blame them. I was a broken man, Savy and I'll go to the ends of the earth to fix things with my girls." He smiled with the corners of his mouth then planted a kiss on my forehead
"I love you, Savannah. Goodbye." He smiled at me one more time then turned to leave. Well, at least this time I got to say goodbye.
There's an unfamiliar image, dad's back leaving. We were usually the one's leaving him...I wasn't given a choice, my mother decided I didn't need a father and that was it
I turned around and slowly made my way back inside the house. Mom and Josie were peeping through the window when I got back, I slammed the door and they quickly walked towards me.
"You know, you guys became the bitter people dad was back then. You mother, you're always preaching forgiveness and you ran away from dad when I was 11 years old." I paused and gazed at either of them. Tears streamed down my face.
"Your divorce was finalised the following year. He was my hero, and you took my hero from me. No one was there to save me. You worked all the time and Josie was being a teenager. I am going to be 18 soon and for the first time in 7 years I see my dad, you deprive me from him, again." I placed my hand over my mouth with the hope that it would help to get my crying under control.
"He was sincere." I whispered. Mom crossed her arms then said,
"That man ruined me to love, again. Why are you choosing sides?" She exclaimed. I shook my head and held my hands before my chest when she tried to hug me.
"I'm not!" I managed to get out before I stormed upstairs.
"Savannah...." I heard mom call before I slammed my bedroom door shut.
I threw myself onto my bed and gave in to the tears I was trying to hold back.
My dad was terrible to us and I don't understand why his return affected me this much, I should hatw him...right? I'm sure it had much more to do with the fact that I missed him so much. I shouldn't even be crying over this, I shouldn't even feel sad. And now he had me feeling guilty for loving him, I didn't want to be wrong by loving my own father.
********
It was 4 pm when I decide to go for a walk, I needed fresh air to clear my mind. The weather has been as gloomy as my mood. I slip on sweatpants, my sneakers and a hoodie. I couldn't find my phone I probably left it downstairs. I grabbed my headphones from the nightstand then hurried downstairs to search for my phone.
Mom and Josie were nowhere to be seen but, I could hear their voices. I silently got my phone and turned on some much needed classical music. As soon as I got outside I started strolling down the road. Thankfully, the street was empty and I said a little prayer to myself that it stayed this way.
I wish I had someone other than my narrow minded mother or sister to vent to about my dad. As that thought surfaced; tears made their way down my cheeks.
I looked down at the ground as an attempt to avoid the group of people who just randomly strolled passed me. As I walked...suddenly, a hand covered my mouth from behind.
What? I grabbed their hand and oh shit!
I was being attacked.
YOU ARE READING
Inflowing Tide (#Wattys2016)
RomanceWhen I returned to him, I was stood in the doorway and watched him as he spoke into his cell phone; I couldn't hear what he was saying , I slowly walked closer to him. "Yes you piece of shit. Come close to her again and I'll kill you with my bare h...
