For The Better

Chapter 29

AN: hey guys, sorry for not updating! This Chapter is a sad one and if you cant handle like suicide(no one dies) stuff then I suggest you don't read it. DON'T GET ANGRY AT ME FOR THIS I WROTE IT SUCH A LONG TIME AGO WHEN I WAS IN A DARK PLACE SO PLEASE DON'T HATE! Thank you. Read on :)

-Shailene's Pov-

I stand in the bathroom
I looked through my room and I had finally found it.

The razor presses into my skin, stinging at first but then I feel it.

The relief.

I watch the blood bead up on my freshly sliced skin.
I want to wipe it away act like it never happened but Its so beautiful.

My parents would be ashamed. They would think I was a coward for letting go. For relapsing.

For showing them I'm not dauntless.

Faction before blood.

Lucas told me that before…

I sigh

I feel tears break from my eyes and the slide over my cheeks

I stop crying when I hear my parents come home from a party.

I wipe up the blood and wash my face to make it look like I wasn't crying.

I pull my sleeves down and take a deep breath.

I walk out

My parents are sitting at the kitchen table and holding hands.

Like everyday.

They never stop holding hands or at least touching each other in some way.

My mother is picking glitter from her hair and my father and smiling at her and shaking his head.

"What?" my mother frowns.

"I told you Christina was going to put all her glitter on you. Drunk girls and glitter do not go well together." He says laughing.

My mother rolls her eyes and shakes the glitter on him.

my father makes a face like this ._. and my mother makes a face like this :3

I smile a little and walk into my room silently.

I lay on the bed and look at pictures of me and Lucas on my phone.

I feel tears and I don't try to hold them back this time.

-PAGE BREAK! haven't had one of these in foreva-

-Shailene's Pov-

I stand in the dining hall watching the new initiates eat.

Well not in a creepy way.

I'm really watching one of the really skinny girls not eat.

She needs to eat and get some muscle if she wants to get even close to staying.

I flick my eyes to the boy shes staring at and he's staring at me.

I bush a violent red and hurry out.

damn it damn it damn it! Why do I put myself in dumb situations?!

I run as far as my body will let me and pant against the stone walls of countless

I look around once i've caught my breath.

It's too dark so I take out my phone and use it as a light.

Part of me wants to know where the hell I am the ther wants to find a way the hell out.

I stand and put my hand to the wall and follow it down the dark hall to I feel wood.

I roam my hand around and find a handle.

I turn it and it opens surprisingly.

AN: SO SO SO SORRY ITS SHORT! It was kinda a filler chappie :/ Leave nice reviews please :)