For The Better

Chapter 33

AN: Sorry for this being short

Shailene's POV

Have you ever seen a person you love get killed? Do you understand the meaning of life just from that? Do you ever want to just hurt everything including yourself? Do you ever just think it's all your fault? Have you ever seen a coffin? Have you ever seen your father's lifeless body float, being smashed against rocks over and over and over? Have you ever wondered why it's you? Why all this bad stuff happens to you?

I have.

My mother died December 3rd

The next year my father died on the same day from suicide.

He wasn't the same after that phone call.

I remember him screaming at me "Who's dead?! Shai! Shailene TELL ME!"

I couldn't tell him anything.

My mother's eyes were staring at me, cold and dead.

I hung up the phone and my dad bursted through the door and he fell grabbing my mother and trying to wake her up.

My mother was dead.

Dead.

And it was all my fault.

I remember him telling me it wasn't and that I did the best I could but from the way he looked at me and talked to me I knew he thought it was my fault. Right?

Shortly after my father had a funeral for my mother.

I walked up to see her body.

Her eyes were open and I closed them.

She looked so… Beautiful.

Her hair fell in all the right places and her pale body looked so beautiful.

My mother was never beautiful but I guess death changes everyone.

I looked at her lips and saw they put this horrid bright purple lipstick on her.

I took a tissue and whipped it off.

She would've thanked me.

I walked off proud.

Not because I whipped the lipstick off or because I looked at her in a beautiful way but because I didn't cry.

I never let a single tear fall.

I didn't even feel like crying.

I never cried again since.

Not even when my father died. I smiled for him, because I knew he was happier. He didn't have to look at his horrible excuse for a daughter any longer and didn't have to lie to me any longer.

Hell I would be happy too.

The girl who killed my mother was named Carie Woolf.

She stabbed my mother the first time when she was training, then she stabbed my mother killing her child, and then she stabbed her one last time. This time succeeding. Killing my mother.

I don't think anyone saw it coming.

I don't know why she wanted my mother dead but I guess It doesn't matter right?

I killed her.

I still feel her blood smothered on one side of me.

The bitch popped like a balloon.

Deserved it.