The music was already pumping when the three of us walked into the auditorium. Marchel and Sam got into a small argument over who would pay for my ticket, which I solved my handing the bored looking senior my money. We waited awkwardly for Sam as they fumbled with some loose coins at the canteen. "Here," Sam handed me a can of creaming soda and opened their own. Marchel didn't get one. We found a corner to mull in. There were already piles of balloons in assorted colours scattered around the stage. A few idiotic boys in white plastic masks were jumping on them, trying to make them pop. "You alright?" Sam asked me, "You want to go into the foyer away from them," The last word was said with mild disgust. "Nah I'm cool," I shook my head and took a sip of my drink, taking in more of my surroundings. The DJ was trying desperately to hype us up, putting on thumping dance music and handing out glow sticks to over excited year sevens. "Why would you need to go?" I realised that Marchel was still next to me. "She has anxiety," Sam looked daggers at him. As if he had committed some type of crime by not knowing this. I shot a 'what are you doing?' look towards my friend. Sam rolled their eyes. "Oh that's to bad," Marchel looked at the floor. I was trying desperately to indicate for Sam to walk away but they weren't having a bar of it. Oh my god go away, I thought in frustration. "Hey Sam!" finally. Danielle walked in wearing a sparkly purple dress and glittery high heals, clearly not getting the idea of 'nightmare'. Sam smiled in her general direction whilst whispering "Help me,". I ignored the plea and turned to talk to Marchel. Sam sulked reluctantly away as Dannielle pulled them towards the stage. We were alone. Marchel's black hair, swept over his forehead. It looked soft and fluffy. I had the sudden urge to run my fingers through it. I bet he uses really expensive conditioner, I cringed at my own thought. The lights went off and there was an enthusiastic cheer from a group of year eleven girls, all in tight dresses and small, feathery masks. Obviously trying a four musketeers look. Again they didn't seem to understand the 'nightmare' theme. "Wanna dance?" Marchel held out his hand, a cheeky smile on his face. I grinned in return. "I just need to go to the loo first!" I yelled as the music got considerably louder. He pouted and indicated that he would wait. He won't wait, I thought, he's got friends. When I emerged, the party was in full swing. There were clusters of girls gossiping on the sidelines, herds of wannabe junior boys having dab offs and seeing who could flip the bottle first, grade seven kids, clearly having the most sugar they'd ever been aloud. The cliques started to merge together in the center dance pile, a cluster of sweaty teenagers bopping their heads to raging techno music. Various dance battles were starting to develop. I scanned the room for someone, anyone I would know. Marchel was nowhere to be seen. Sam and Danielle had gone off somewhere. I couldn't see anyone vaguely recognisable. I started to panic. Balloons were being popped around me at an unbelievable rate. The music hammered in my chest. Bodys pushed me this way and that. I was being shoved into the centre pile. Oh dear god. Which way was the door? I needed to get out of there. People were getting closer to me. The music was getting louder. Balloons were popping right in my face. I could feel tears in my throat. My stomach clenched with sickness. I was suffocating. Suddenly I was in the middle of a dance battle. Then I was pulled unwillingly further into the crowd. The floor was spinning. I was sweating. My breath was as heavy as the wall of humans in which I was engulfed. I needed to sit down. I needed to run. I needed a hug. I needed to get as far away from people as possible. That was it. I couldn't take it anymore. Tears were streaming down my face as I sunk to the ground in defeat. I was sobbing. The flurry of legs around was getting denser. I was alone there on the floor. I was alone. All alone. "Luce?"
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Hey guys!! Ohmygod I didn't realise that describing a panic attack was so freaking HARD! I tried the best I could though. Part of this chapter is actually a true story cause the last school disco I was at I freaked and ended up going home early. Tell me if this is good or not?? Thanks! I didn't mean to make the reference in the title and I only just realised. I'm not a patd fan as such but hey shout out to them.
Btw I'm gonna add a little shameless self promo here and say that I have a YouTube channel and you should check it out. It's called Cynda Lee (same user as Wattpad)
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Darkness
RomanceFear. It runs our lives. Fear of crowds, fear of rejection, fear of the dark... It's not so much concurring your fears, it's learning to live with them.