Too Complicated

Chapter 62.

It feels nice to laugh again. Sure, I had good times in Australia, but this is different. I feel like the events a few months ago never happened and it's just a normal day. It is a normal day.

"This is so good," I moan. Who knew that S'mores could be so satisfying? I guess that's what I get for not eating one in years.

Tyrese laughs, swinging his arm over the back of my chair. "I know, right?"

I nod, trying not to make a fool of myself while eating this sticky treat. I also forgot how incredibly messy these things are.

While away in Australia, it took me a while to get back to my old eating habits, or to eating in general. I never had an appetite and that took its toll on me. I dropped almost ten pounds in just a few weeks, it was scary. Therapy helped me somewhat with that, but Rosalie and Mike were actually the first people who made me eat. It felt like nothing tasted the same anymore, though. Same with the world, it lost its color after Gavin happened.

How could someone that brought so much light on your life end up taking it all away and leave you with darkness?

"So," Tyrese starts. "Are you excited for senior year?"

I haven thought about it much, honestly, but knowing that all of this will be behind us once these seniors are gone, makes me happy. I won't have to see Darren, Nick, or Gavin. Richard will still be here, but I can avoid him.

"You could say that," I nod. "I'm just excited to get over this whole thing."

He looks understanding which I'm glad for, he doesn't ask to go into detail. "I would too. That whole thing shouldn't of even happened."

I agree, but that doesn't change anything. I've learned to forget. Forgive? Probably will never happen, but that's to be expected.

"I'm going to go get some water," I tell Tyrese, this little treat has made me thirsty. "Would you like anything?"

"Nah," he grins. "I'm good, just make sure you come back to me."

I laugh when he winks and walk away towards the house. Tammy and Hailey are still by the fire talking to some guys, and I smile at that.

Luckily, the house is a lot cooler than I expected it to be, but I immediately feel suffocated. And I know why.

"Why didn't you tell me she was back?" His voice still has the same effect on me, the same shiver of pleasure runs through my spine and it's not normal. This shouldn't be happening after everything he's done.

"I didn't even know!" Chanel yells, her face towards me and Gavin's back to me. "I just ran into her outside-"

I should leave when she notices me, because I know in just a short amount of time Gavin will soon spot me, but I can't seem to move. A part of me wants him to see me, to know he didn't break me like he obviously wanted, but I know I should bolt.

"What're you-" Too late. He turns around before I can do anything and I nearly gasp.

I shouldn't think he looks good tonight, I should be disgusted by anything having to do with him, yet I find the slight scrubble covering his jaws hot. His green eyes stare at me with shock, the navy blue of his shirt seemingly make them more vibrant. And God, his hair, it looks perfectly tousled something that I found myself adoring when we were together.

You mean when he was using you for a sick bet?

The house seems quiet now, like the only two people in here are Gavin and me.

"Bella." He clears his throat after he says it, the deepness of tone making me look away. Why does it seem like he's aged years when I've only been gone for six months?