Love Me or Leave Me

XIII. I like him

What a gloomy weather, I sat on my table looking out at the window. The leaves are falling from the tree as the wind has the mood of swaying it from left to right. I felt the cold breeze that touched my warm face.
I giggled with the sense of comfort the wind has keeping me. I like this.
I like the idea of a quiet, gloomy ambiance in my room. Everyone's out for a shopping. There are 2 weeks left before school.

I am tiny bit excited of the feelimg that I can sing again with my choir org. I Missed singing church's songs and sing with the band. I missed being alone all day with my books! Without anything to think of. Then all of a sudden, I have a thought of Carl.

Everything he was. The way he talks,  his wide smile, his red lips, his curly hair, brown eyes.... his sweet gestures when he was excited... I quite remember all the things about him.

A tear fell from my eyes, I don't know why. Perhaps, I am sad that he only thinks of me as a GOOD FRIEND, that's all.

My phone's ringing...

I saw Carl's name on my screen.

I felt anxious at the same time... i don't know what he wants. But I told him as whenever he wants or needs me, I'll be right there for him.. what a stupid fuq, i am! I have no choice but to answer his call.

"Hello?", I said it with a trembled voice.

"Hi Lei, I Was just thinking if  you want to come with us?, we will watching a "battle of the band" tonight..", he said like he forgotten Sia from his mind.

I don't know what to say... I am hesitant right now to come again, with him, I don't know...

"Carl, I don't know..", I Replied like I Wanted to vanish right now and go far away from him.

"What do you mean you don't know? You mean, you can't for tonight?, Carl clarified.

"I mean I love to but I feel sick today.. I'm sorry Carl..", I said. Yes, it's true. I'm sick. And tired... like literally. I hate the fact that I am no good in handling hard feelings like this. I just can't.

"What? Are you sick? How do you feel? Have you took a medicine for that? Or do you need a doctor to see you?, I can accompany you if it's like an urgent thing!", Carl's voice getting louder and worried.

"No, no Carl. Don't worry it's not like what you think. I can manage. I'm a nurse, right?", I chuckled. I don't like someone worrying about me. And he only cares because im his friend.

"Are you sure?", Carl asked.

"Of course yes,! thank you Carl, you're a thoughtful guy", I said gratefully.

"Okay, just make sure you can handle it. If not you can call or text me anytime. I can go there within a one snap!", he joked.

"Haha, yah yah! Don't worry. I'm good! You and the rest of the troop enjoy! Okay.", I Said cheerfully.

"Yeah. Thanks Lei..get well soon. So, bye for now", Carl said.

"Ok bye..", then we hanged up.

Mix emotions! And confused. How come he always treating me like that. I appreciate his concern but it making me suffer more.. 😔