Hey guys, if you are in the states I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. With the holidays and I am still struggling with my own stuff it has been hard to keep up with this. I am not even going to tell you when I'm going to update again because I can never seem to keep to a schedule anyway. I'm sorry guys but thanks for sticking with this story I'm so thrilled with the amount of people who like it. I love you guys! (: ~beautifulgoodbyexx
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The next few days at practice were intense and I couldn't land anything. I was so frustrated with myself and I know all of my mistakes was only giving Monica more satisfaction. After practice I went home and took a shower. I was so frustrated with myself and depressed because I knew I probably wouldn't be on the team with Taylor anymore which is basically the only reason I'm staying on the team. I laid on the couch and cuddled with Zoey as I flipped through the channels on television.
"How was practice?" my dad asked leaning over the back of the couch looking down at me.
"Just great." I rolled my eyes.
He looked at me confused, "What's your problem?"
I sighed, "Nothing."
He left the couch to get a drink from the kitchen but he kept talking to me as he walked, " Oviously something."
"Coach is kicking me off the team."
I could hear my dad choke on his water, "What?"
"It was unacceptable for me to miss three months of practice. I have an individual trial on Friday deciding if I can stay on the team. I can't land any of my stunts and if I get bumped from the elite level I can't compete at states, which means I can't compete at nationals then I can't compete at worlds which means I lost a whole year of possibly going to the olympics. Which probably isn't going to happen anyway but making it to worlds looks good for college and even a possible scholarship. Plus Monica is making my life a living hell at the gym and if I get dropped down levels I won't be on a team with Taylor anymore and..." I want to continue to rant but my dad stops me.
"Slow down Lex. Everything is going to work out." my dad said.
I rolled my eyes, "Yeah because everything always works out!"
"No it doesn't." he paused and sat next to me on the couch, "But you can't live in the negative forever."
"What if I want to? What if I just want to be depressed forever?!" I stood up and yelled.
"Lex you're worrying me..." my dad started.
"Damn it dad. Just because I'm upset doesn't mean I'm going to kill myself!" I grabbed my jacket off the back of the couch and walked towards the door.
My dad immediately stood up and grabbed my arm, "Where are you going?" his voice was low, calm, and warm.
I sighed and pulled my arm out of his grasp, "Logan's."
He nodded his head and watched me pull out of the driveway. I pulled into the gym and went inside straight to the bars. When I couldn't land any of those stunts I went to the beam, then to the vault, then to floor. I just needed to land a simple back handspring at this point to satisfy myself. I finally just fell on the floor and screamed pressing my hands to my head in anger. I heard the doors to the gym open and close but I didn't bother to look.
"Are you done?" I heard my coach say from behind me.
"Leave me alone." I said in a low harsh voice.
He sighed, "What are you doing here Lex? You already had a three hour practice."
"I need more practice." I said simply.
