Uncovered Secrets

Christmas Day

I wake up on the couch with a blanket wrapped around me. I sit up and see Heather sitting by my legs watching TV on an iPad.

"Hey!" She says, looking up.

"Hi sweetie." I yawn, "What time is it?"

"Seven-twenty-three." She says, smiling proudly. "I'm only six, but Mom taught me how to tell time!" I laugh. I love Heather. Her innocence and sweetness remind me of when I was younger, how simple everything was. I pull down my sleeves and get up.

"Do you know where Kevin is?" I ask.

"He took Naya and Lucy for a walk." I remember the small white dog Naya got for Christmas; she must have named her Lucy.

"Did you eat or do you want something?" I ask.

"I ate." She responds, distracted by whatever she's watching.

"Okay." I to into the kitchen and make coffee, and soon I hear the door open.

"Hey!" Kevin says when he sees me in the kitchen. His nose is red and he's wearing the knitted hat I bought him for Christmas.

"Hi." I smile at him.

"Did you check your stocking?" He asks me, causing me to scowl.

"Kevin. I said no gifts, and you already got me a guitar!"

"First of all, that guitar was bought four years ago, so it doesn't count-"

"No more gifts from you!" I say.

"It's not from me! It's from Santa!" Kevin says innocently.

"Kevin," I growl, "we both know that Santa-" Kevin coughs really loudly and directs his eyes to my right where I see Heather standing, holding the iPad. "H-hey Heather..." I say.

"Do you have a charger?" She asks, holding up the iPad.

"Yeah. Yeah I'll go get it." Kevin smiles. After Kevin leaves, I got this uneasy feeling, like something was wrong.

"Hey... you okay?" Asks Kevin when he returns. I know something's wrong at that point, because it sounds like he's talking to me through glass.

"Fine." I say, because I don't want to ruin his Christmas.

"You don't look fine, Demi." He says.

"I am, Kevin. Really. I'm just a little tired." He nods and wraps his arm around my waist.

I go into the bathroom half an hour later, feeling like I'm going to puke. I throw up a few times, and a headache starts in, but I tell myself that if I tell Kevin what's wrong, I'll just ruin his Christmas. After a while, I can't take the intense pain and I open the medicine cabinet. I can barely see, and I'm getting dizzy. I grab a bottle of pills randomly and then I fall. I knock down a bunch of bottles and fall hard on my butt- which only adds to the pain. I grab the bottle of pills I'm holding and open the cap, blindly pouring them into my hand and dry swallowing them. The pain end after a little bit, and I become numb. It's a funny feeling, really. I feel light, and slightly tingly, but most of all, numb. I can't feel anything. I look at my wrists, and the usual guilt and hatred doesn't come. I don't feel anything and it feels fucking great. I pick up my mess and go into the living room where everyone is.

"Hey!" I say.

"Hi!" Kevin smiles at me. But then I see a scared look cross his face. "Dem can we have a word?" I laugh because this seems hilarious to me.

"Sure we can have a word, Kevin." I say.

"Are you high?" He asks me once he's dragged me into the kitchen.

"No! Why would you think that?" I ask.

"Because you look like it."

"Keviiiiin. Stop. I am, am so not high. Okay, I just want you to have a good time with your..." And my voice fades away, and everything is silent. I can't hear or feel anything, but I can see. Things are fuzzy, but I can see Kevin's face getting farther away, and then I bounce a little. I can see Kevin moving in slow motion, see him shaking me. But my eyes start to close and then everything's dark.