His Exception (Ongoing)

without me

without me

Kase

  
Pano ko ba uumpisahan?

Pwede bang wag nalang?

Kung sana ganun nalang kadali, kung meron lang, Kung pwede lang laktawan ginawa ko na. One week after we talk and it's still hard for me to decide. Masyadong mabilis sakin kahit na three weeks pa ang pagitan. I've been on and off with Cassy the whole week, I know I should be spending more time with her. Na dapat sinusulit ko na dahil wala naman akong choice. I have actually, pero mas dapat kong gawin yung tama. This time I have to face this like a man. Kasi hindi naman to basta-basta natatakbuhan. But you know the more I think about being with her the more I don't want to go.. It will get harder. Hindi ko alam pano ko ipapaintindi na mawawala ako ng ilang taon... and I don't know kung kelan ako makakabalik or kung makakabalik paba ako. I'll be too much... asking her trust kahit na nag sisimula palang kami kilalanin talaga ang isa't isa.

Sobrang mahal na mahal ko siya.

Isang linggo nako nag iisip, hindi maka tulog ng maayos, tulala at naka tingin lang sa telepono ko.

If I can just take you like a picture so I can stay beside you while I'm away..

I can't.

"Is there something you want to tell me?"

I look up finally have the courage to face her after I said I need time.

I was at her apartment, silent. Parang ayoko nang umalis, gusto ko nalang na andun lang ako sa tabi niya. Dito sa sala niya.

"Can I kiss you?" I said out on cue. She was looking at me confused, curious.. she knew me well enough to tell that something is off. But she's just waiting for me.

Lumapit ako sa kanya at tinignan muna siya sandali bago siya halikan.

I could stay like this. Na sa tuwing gigising ako ikaw na yung kaharap ko para lagi kong mahahalikan tong labi mo. I could be selfish to the world and nobody can ever complain why because I can, because your mine.

I hug you close to me and you close your eyes.

I never thought I would be contented with just holding you. I always wanted more.. but I accept whatever you can give.

Mas pinalalim ko ang halik sayo. Gusto kong iparamdam na hindi ko gustong umalis dahil hindi ko kayang sabihin sayo.

Kasi pag dating sayo mahina ako.

Binuhat kita upang mas lalo kang mapalapit sakin. Para bang kahit anong mangyari andito kapa rin. Gusto kitang ikulong lang sa bisig ko. Dito kalang. Kasi sakin kalang.

Bumaba ang halik ko sa mga leeg mo.. I never crossed your bounderies because you know damn well how much I respect you. Pero hindi ko na napigilan sarili ko. I missed you so much. All of you. Isang linggo lang pero parang hindi ko na kaya..

Hindi ko kayang tiisin ka.

Your heart is racing as I suck your skin leaving a mark.

Nanga-ngati ang aking kamay na tanggalin ang pang itaas mo, pero bago pa mangyari yun ay binaba na kita at sinigurado kong maayos ang itchura mo.

You bite your lips everytime.

Gusto kong sabihin na gustong gusto ko nang mapasakin ka ngayon na pero pinigilan ko yung sarili ko.

"Umiiyak kaba? Ano ba kasing problema?" Nag mamadali ka nang makita mong namumuo na yung luha ko sa mata.

"I'm sorry Cassy.."