H O L O G R A M

Absence makes the heart go

Josh continued to practice basketball and tried to focus on the upcoming championship. He’s been trying to keep his mind off Hanna. It’s almost two weeks since she stopped contacting him. He misses her badly but kept hoping that she’ll come back eventually. He believes that they have something special and that’ll be worth coming back to.

He was in the gym with his teammates doing offensive drills when he noticed Steve on the entrance door waving at him. He nodded back and Steve went to sit on the bleachers.

After thirty minutes, the practice finished and he went to the locker room to change. He and Steve started to hang out more. He’s a really cool guy. A little nerdy but he’s a great listener. Steve listened to Josh prattle about Hanna and he never complains. Out of all the friends Josh has, Steve is the only one who knows about Hanna.

Josh knows that there is a stigma with liking or worse falling in love with a person online. He was very proud of Hanna but he knows that somehow people wouldn’t have an understanding with what he feels. He’s grateful that Steve never judged him and ridiculed him.

“Hey bro,” Josh greeted Steve. Steve stood up and patted his jeans as if it has dust all over it. They went out of the gym and agreed to hang out in Josh’s house to play COD.

“I didn’t know you were into video games,” Josh says after clambering in Steve’s car.

Steve smile while starting the engine, “I’m not. I suck at shooting games,”

The car came to life and they started driving out of the campus.

“Okay. So why play? Why don’t we go out somewhere? Clubbing?”

“Hah! How about no?” Steve looked at him, shaking his head.

“Why not? We could find you a girl tonight, dude! I’ll be your wingman.”

Steve just laughed and said, “Nah, I’d have a better chance of surviving a zombie apocalypse than getting a girl tonight.”

Josh sniggered, “You’re not that bad, bro.”

“You think so?”                                                                                                         

“Absolutely.”

They stopped in front of Josh’s home. Josh wondered why the lights were all off. “Are your parents out?” asked Steve. They both got out of the car and Josh unlocked the gates.

“They usually text me if they headed out,” He pulled the phone from his pocket and shook his head.
“No messages though.”

The house was dark and Josh started to worry. His mother never lets the house seem uninviting. A foreboding feeling swamped over Josh that he stopped walking halfway from the front door. Steve stopped as well and looked back at him.

“I don’t know but something isn’t right, Steve.”

“What do you mean?”

“My mom will never ever let our house this dark. She’s crazy over appearances. Even if we go on vacations, she let those lights lit up. Even the name plate on our gate! That wasn’t lit up. My mom would go berserk over that.  Even the curtains, Steve. The curtains are drawn and down!”

Steve looked amusedly at him as if he was crazy. “Maybe they just forgot. Come on, I want to pee!”

“Wait!” Josh yelled back.

“What?! “ Steve started to scrunch his legs looking as if he needed to pee badly.

Josh immediately scrolled through his phone and called his mother. It rang for a minute but no answer.
“I called her but she’s not answering! She always answers her phone,”

“Who?”

“My mom!”

Josh worriedly looked at the house. Maybe something bad happened. He dashed to the front door while Steve yelled, “Hey, wait!”

Josh unlocked the door and darkness enveloped everything. He couldn’t see a thing on their living room. 
Suddenly, light flooded the whole room.

“Surprise!”

The whole room erupted with cheering and greeting. “Happy Birthday, Josh!”

Steve suddenly placed a firm hand over his shoulders and led him to his parents, friends and teammates. Coach Alfred and his wife were also there. “Son, Happy Birthday!” his mom kissed his cheeks while she was holding out his birthday cake.

Josh forgot about today. He was too busy focusing for the upcoming games and Hanna, that he forgot that it was his birthday. He looked at all the people all around him and realized how fortunate he was.

But these people can’t seem to fill a hole in his heart. Only one person can.

“Bro, what’s with the fucking frown?”
Steve suddenly was in front of him giving him a beer cup. After everybody sang happy birthday to him, they went on eating the food his mom prepared at the same time enjoy the open bar his dad put out at the garden. Everybody seems to be having such a great time except Josh.

“Are you okay?”

Josh nodded back. He swirled his beer cup waiting for the bubbles to subside. He sighed and pursed his lips trying not to bawl like a baby in front of Steve. He was nice enough to help his parents plan his surprise birthday party. Josh doesn’t want to appear ungrateful. He really is but he can’t help feeling sad without Hanna. He misses her so damn much.

“Its Hanna, isn’t it?” Steve leaned back on the wall and placed his hands in his pocket.

“Does she even think about me?”

“I’m sure she does.”

Josh threw the cup away and angrily screamed at Steve, “Then why is she doing this, Steve? Why does she have to disappear like that? She’s fucking online! She’s seen the video! She’s seen all the 1000 messages I’ve been sending her! Why is she avoiding me? If she’s fucking thinking about me, why can’t she come back?”

Even in the darkness, Josh sees that Steve paled with his outburst. He was so mad at Hanna. He was also mad at himself for flaring up like that. All he did was hide his feelings. He tried so damn hard to look okay and focus on what other people thinks is the best for him.

“I’m sorry, Steve.” Josh turned his back on Steve in shame.

Steve patted his back and left him alone. Josh covered his face with his hands. He knows he’s going crazy about thinking of some girl. He’s definitely going crazy falling for someone he hasn’t met. He hasn’t even heard her voice. What can I do? I can’t stop thinking about her, Josh thought.

All of a sudden, his phone rang. Incoming Skype call.

His eyes grew wide and hands trembled. He tapped the green button to answer it.

He placed the phone in his ears.

He held his breath. The world stopped moving. The night stilled. The moon looked so much brighter.

All he can hear is silence and faint breathing on the other line.

“Hello? Josh?”

And then he died.