The Impending Doom of Neighbours (Stylinson)

What a feeling {12}

I am not in any way, shape or form romanticizing the way that Harry is treating Louis in this book and you WILL see proof of that later on. A lot of people are saying that Harry needs help. I agree. But this isn't real life so you all need to just chill. People have been asking if Harry is bipolar. The answer? No. He's not. Though he definitely shows symptoms of obsessive love disorder. Again, this will be explained further on in the book. For now, just enjoy. Thank you 

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"Wanna be my girlfriend?" Harry asked, tilting his head to the side to look at Louis properly 

"How can I be your girlfriend if m'not a girl?" Louis questioned, pouting up at Harry 

"I...don't know" Harry admitted "I saw it on a movie" he explained "There was one boyfriend and one girlfriend" 

"Then why can't you be my girlfriend?" Louis asked 

Harry shrieked at this, his shocked noise turning into loud laughter "Because I'm big and strong!" Harry argued "I don't even look like a girl" 

"I'm big too!" Louis protested 

"You're a little baby" Harry stated, hugging Louis tightly "My cute little baby girlfriend" 

Louis giggled at this, squirming away from Harry "Why do I have to be your girlfriend" 

"Because mummy said that girlfriends and boyfriends stay together forever" Harry replied "That's what we're going to do, right?" 

"You want to stay with me forever?" Louis questioned, overjoyed at Harry's words, a bright smile lighting up his face "Really?" 

"Yes" Harry said, his tone certain "Never gonna leave you" 

"Promise?" Louis questioned, holding out his pinky finger to Harry

"Promise" Harry confirmed with a giggle, linking his little finger with Louis' 

And just like that, an eternal bond was formed

***

People say that love is a strong word 

But to say that Harry loved Louis was an understatement; in fact, it was such an understatement that it would be completely futile to even say in the first place

Harry had been infatuated with Louis since the first time he ever met him at the age of 4

And, of course, he didn't exactly tell the boy that he loved him because of various reasons. The first reason being that he was afraid to admit that he was gay. In a world that has come so far in it's attempts to accept homosexuality, it almost seems silly to say that Harry was 'afraid', but he was. Since being young he'd always been a poster boy for the jock of the school, and he didn't want to ruin that by breaking the stereotypes

The second reason that Harry would never tell Louis about his feelings, was because he knew that Louis didn't feel the same. Sure Louis was gay, but he'd always made it evident that Harry was nothing more than a friend to him (if that)

The third reason was that Harry knew that he could never love Louis conventionally. He'd never been the type of person to say 'I love you', nor the type of person to express their feelings in general. He knew deep down that Louis deserved all of that, and he would never be able to give it to him 

The final reason that he wouldn't tell Louis his true feelings, is that he was in complete and utter denial. His feelings ran so deep for Louis that he could hardly differentiate whether it was love or hate that he felt towards the boy. It had simply become an obsessive desire to never leave his side. Harry was obsessed with Louis in the strangest of ways