Xavier [COMPLETED]

36.

Chapter 36.

X A V I E R

"Fuck!" I yelled as I slammed my fist against the blue bricked wall. Blood started to streak from my new found wound but I didn't give a shit. It hurt like a motherfucker but my head felt that messed up I didn't have it in me to care.

"What the fuck have I done?" I grabbed my hair inbetween my two hands and pulled. I would welcome any pain right now, anything that would get Emily's face out of my fucking mind.

It killed me to leave her when she needed me. She hated me now, I could see it in her eyes. She would definitely not want to marry me, she would want nothing to do with me anymore. Fuck, my heart was crushing.

I was so stupid, so fucking messed up and she cried for goodness sake, she cried for me, because of me. I made her this way all because I couldn't keep my anger in check. I was a shit boyfriend and I was going to be an even worse husband. I didn't fucking deserve her, why had it taken me this long to realise it? Why did I ever think I could live with myself for being happy with someone I didn't deserve?

I laid my forehead which was coated with sweat on the wall. It was a great contrast as the wall was cold. I just needed to calm down.

But how could I calm down? I was stuck behind metal fucking bars and my girl was out there crying without me. I just wanted to hug her close, tell her how much I loved her. I wanted her to stay but I was so scared she'd leave and this time, I think I'd let her. It would fucking kill me but she needed better.

"Hey." A baton was hit lightly against the metal bars to get my attention. I turned around to see the cop. He had a dark black beard and his hat was laying inbetween his waist and his arm. He swung the baton back into its rightful place. I walked up closer to him.

"What?" I couldn't keep the bitterness out of my voice.

"Seems like you've been bailed out." He tutted before unlocking the lock of the bars.

Did that mean Emily was here? Thank fuck! My heart began beating quickly and I actually started to gain hope. I thought she'd let me rot in here all night, I deserved it.

"Thanks." I said to the cop and he grabbed my arm and led me out to the reception area. I looked up to the clock and it was almost four in the morning. I had been locked up for over three hours. That was enough, I had driven myself insane.

It's not the first time I had been locked up but I didn't usually care. I had Emily now and I couldn't be sat inside that cell all night when she needed me. I just fucking couldn't.

As soon as I made my way into the reception area I scanned the place for Emily. I was like a starved man. I needed her.

But as soon as my eyes set on Nick, I lost all hope I had. She hadn't come to bail me out, she must have been mad with me. She was angry, I got that. But God, I didn't want Nick, I wanted Emily.

"What the fuck have you done?" Nick stood up and walked over to me. The cop let me go and Nick walked me out of the station.

"It was just a street brawl." I grumbled. "It doesn't matter." Nick turned to look at me with furrowed brows.

"I thought you had stopped this?" He questioned. I lowered my head. Me too. Emily had changed me for the better, I didn't know why I did it. I just felt so angry yesterday about the whole situation with my mother, I needed a fight, I needed that unleash of anger. It was the only way I knew how.