⚘ Synesthesia ⚘

Chapter 5 ⚘

Chapter 5 of 11:
Everything is Grey

Grey and Blue. Grey and Blue. Grey and Blue. That was all Avery was feeling at the moment.

Ryder's phone was still broken, so the two couldn't communicate via text, but Avery still snuck over to his best friend's house every once and awhile to check on him. At school they were able to talk a little bit as well, which slightly eased some of Avery's worry for his friend.

Lately Avery had been hearing voices, similar to the incident a few years ago. He supposed that they were coming back because he had stopped taking his dumb medications, and because he had walked out on Dr. Hughes countess amounts of times.

Calling them voices seemed a little odd, considering Avery didn't really see them that way. He wasn't crazy, he just had a lot of inner thoughts that bounced around in his head. But for lack of a better word, Avery just decided to stick with calling them what he had been previously. It was easier that way.

Every time Avery went over to see his friend he meant to tell him about the voices. He tried- he really did- but every time he chickened out.

Ryder already had so much on his plate and Avery's problems surely wouldn't help. Avery hadn't told anyone about how the voices had come back. He thought he had rid himself of them a few years ago, but now they were here again, and they seemed to be stronger than ever.

Silence only gave the voices power, and yet, Avery had remained quiet for days. He felt as if he were being suffocated by the dark colors and the blue tints, and it was getting harder and harder for him to see any sort of light.

Avery was on his way to Ryder's house now. He was planning on telling him about the voices today; although Avery had a sneaking suspicion he would just stay silent.

The voices didn't really like it when Avery talked about them, but sometimes he did it anyway. Avery still had some sort of control, which gave him some relief.

Avery remembered a few years ago, when his voices were at their strongest. It truly was a miserable time full of blacks and greys. The voices told him awful things and made him want to die.

He remembered almost passing out on the bathroom floor after an attempt at taking his own life. Unfortunately for Avery, it didn't work. He didn't swallow enough pills.

Ryder was the one who found him. He came over because Avery wasn't answering his texts. Avery was only half conscious when Ryder showed up.

*

"Avery?" Ryder asked. "Dude, where are you? Avery?" Ryder's voice was becoming more and more frantic. "Avery!" Ryder yelled. He had opened the bathroom door and he saw his best friend laying on the ground his eyes closed.

Ryder ran over to Avery, his head swimming in a very black color. In fact, the whole bathroom seemed to be black. The walls were closing and Ryder was trying to get air. The world was spinning and he fumbled around in his pocket to find his phone. Ryder dialed 9-1-1 immediately and waited for them to show up, doing what the operator was telling him to do in order maintain Avery's consciousness.

*

Come to think of it, Ryder was probably the reason Avery was alive. Avery blinked a few times, trying to stop his eyes from watering. He was past that. He wasn't ever going to do something like that again. He couldn't. He made a promise to Ryder that he wouldn't do something like that, and he intended to keep it. Just the thought of the conversation the two had at the hospital was enough to make sure of that.