⚘ Synesthesia ⚘

Chapter 8 ⚘

Chapter 8 of 11:
You Should Take My Soul

"The voices." Ryder said. "I want to talk about the voices."

***

Avery's dark yellow feeling intensified. He was open to talk about anything other than this.

They dark yellow was mixing with blue to make a green that was dangerously close to black.

He couldn't tell Ryder anything about the voices, mainly because the words they spoke were awful and gave Avery a bitter taste on his tongue. Just the mention of the voices made him want to run.

It was mainly taunting that Avery heard. It was constant scolding and being reprimanded. It all seemed silly, because it was Avery's mind that was saying these things. Shouldn't he have some sort of control?

"Not here." Avery said, reaching up to tug at his hair. He didn't really want to talk at all about this, but there was absolutely no way he was going to talk about it with other people around. Ryder nodded.

"Right, sorry." He said. A silence fell between the two, but it wasn't their normal silence. Whenever Avery and Ryder were silent it never was uncomfortable. It wasn't awkward or weird, but that's exactly how Avery felt now. This silence was deafening. It made Avery think of freezing winter nights, when not even the crickets would chirp. The air felt thick and the tension was even thicker. Maybe Avery was just imagining how bad this was, but Ryder probably felt it too. That's why he wouldn't speak.

Avery thought it couldn't get any more unbearable when Ryder finally spoke up, "Do you want to leave?" He asked.

"What about your cousin?"

"I can talk to him later. This party is starting freak me out a bit." Ryder said.

"Okay." Avery spoke. His voice seemed normal, but on the inside he was filled with immense relief. The orange color was returning and he didn't feel so terrified anymore. Avery slowly pulled his hand away from his hair and tried to focus on breathing.

Avery watched as Ryder got up and made his way over to his cousin. Ryder exchanged a few words before nodding and turning around to leave. Ryder motioned for Avery to follow him.

Avery got up from the stairs and followed Ryder outside.

"I'm glad to be out of there." Ryder said sighing. Avery gave a nod.

"Yeah, me too."

"It was way too stressful." Ryder said. Avery shrugged.

"It felt kind of like a dark yellow." Avery said. Ryder frowned. Another silence fell between the two- this one more bearable than the last. Avery decided that he was going to be the one go break the quietness this time.

"There's three." Avery blurted. Ryder looked over at his friend with a furrowed brow.

"What?" Ryder asked.

"You asked about the voices. There's three of them." Avery said. Avery wasn't sure why he was talking about the voices, but he felt like maybe Ryder should know. Ryder stopped walking and turned to face Avery.

"Are they saying what they used to say?" Ryder asked. Avery swallowed. He thought he was safe out here, but the dark yellow was returning and all the air in his lungs seemed to evaporate all at once. He didn't want to talk about what they were saying.

"No." Avery answered. This was partially true. Although he hadn't been as suicidal as he was a few years ago, the thoughts of death still plagued his mind. "Can we not talk about this?" Avery didn't mean for his voice to sound so strained, but he was becoming quite uncomfortable. It seemed like an unfair request, considering Avery was the one who brought the voices up, but he couldn't bear talking about them for more than a few minutes.