Don't let me fall alone

Stay

Camila POV

"Please say something, Camila.

Do I have to leave or can I stay?"

I'm not sure what I'm supposed to say.

I want her to stay but I can't be what she wants me to be. Not right now. And she will never be happy if she stayed with me.

But what about me? I'd be miserable without her. She completes me. She made me happy more than anyone else.

Why does it have to be this complicated?

"Camz?" She urged me more desperately now.

"...I'm sorry."

---

Lauren POV

The drive home was silent.

Once I dropped her off at her apartment, we both know that it's going to be the end of this.

I'm gonna stay away from her.

Call me selfish and weak because maybe I am. I'm only thinking about myself and my feelings. I'm too weak to continue our friendship. I wasn't thinking about what SHE'S feeling. Above all that, I'm making her feel terrible, making it look like it's her fault that I'm leaving, like it's her fault that she doesn't feel the same way.

But isn't that what we're supposed to do? Protect ourselves from any pain? Everyone has a fight or flight response hard-wired in their minds and this time my urge to "flight" outweighs my urge to "fight" by a hundred times.

Loving Camila has drastically changed my life. I didn't know someone is capable of loving as much as I loved Camila. Love. I still love her. I don't think that's going to change any time soon.

But loving her comes with a great consequence too.

I love her so much that when she told me she doesn't feel the same way about me, I was completely and irreversibly broken.

I was beyond repair at this point that the only thing left to do now is to...leave.

Crazy how when I first told her that I'm in love with her, I thought she was the one who's gonna end up leaving.

---

We reached her apartment but before leaving she turned around and said,

"I really want you to stay but I understand why you wanna leave. But just because I'm letting you leave now, doesn't mean I'm not gonna make you stay next time around.

Once you find it in your heart that you can go back, that you want to go back, I'll be waiting. I'm not going anywhere.

And maybe by that time there will be a reason for you to stay."