a/n: this imagine is told in first person pov and also this is for both of the twins, as the name isn't really specified xx
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she's everything i'm not. but she's everything he wants.
he doesn't know that i know. i know that when he claims he's going to be spending time with his brother for the weekend he's really with her.
everyone thinks we're so happy together, nobody suspects a thing. and for a long time, i didn't either. how was i supposed to know that the man i thought was the love of my life was seeing another woman?
nothing hurts more than the feeling of not being enough. nothing is scarier than lying in bed next to him at night, when he actually bothers to come home, not knowing if it's the last time.
he's already told me, even though he doesn't know it. she's in his dreams, and she consumes his thoughts. sometimes he whispers her name in his sleep. he also doesn't know that i hear him when he sometimes hesitates before moaning my name, having to take a second to think about which one of us he's with at the moment. but i don't say anything.
the worst part is when he makes me feel like everything's okay. when he comes home and presses a kiss to my cheek, or when we go out on dates together. when we go out for breakfast late at night or just drive around listening to music. when he treats me like i'm the only one and i temporarily forget about the other girl. when i forget that i'm not the only one he loves. does he even love me anymore? but, it's always ruined. without failure, she always manages to interfere, and i catch him smiling when he sees a notification from her on his phone. then i'm back to pretending my boyfriend is only mine.
i'll never know why he stays. i don't even know why i let him keep doing this. i've known for so long i should have confronted him by now. but i'm afraid. i'm scared to lose him, even more than i already have. i'd rather have some of him than nothing at all. maybe one day i'll have the strength and finally admit to him that i know.
but, for now i'll just keep pretending i don't.
