FOUR

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I made it onto the highway this time. I didn't slow as I passed the spot where his body had been found but my eyes flew to the arrangement of flowers and I wondered distantly who did it. Maybe his parents, maybe his sister or people from town. Could have been anyone but I would never know. I had never stopped there. I couldn't. Not when I knew that for the first few days there was still blood on the hill and staining the road. A group had gone up and scrubbed it but I only heard afterwards. Seeing his body at the wake... that was enough of a reality check for me. I didn't want to think of him laying there on the side of the road slowly going cold. Not when I could have picked him up that night.

I blinked back tears, fighting them yet again. My vision blurred but I didn't stop until I got home.

My apartment was small. Six hundred square feet, big enough for a kitchen, living room and one bedroom. It was the top floor of a house that had two more apartments below me.

I climbed the staircase up to my living room entrance and unlocked it, bracing myself against the cold.

Evander had helped me move in. It was bright and warm that day.

The apartment was only about five minutes away from my mom and dad's house. I knew they wanted me home. They were worried about me, but I hadn't even been gone for a full year on my own yet and besides, there were way more memories back there. I hadn't been here quite long enough for everything to remind me of him.

Feeling drained and tired, I collapsed onto the couch, choosing TV over the rumbling of my stomach. Not surprisingly, I fell asleep.

When a loud noise woke me with a start, my eyes felt like they were lined with sandpaper. I couldn't make out what was on through my blurry vision but the sound of a chainsaw and screaming was too jarring to want to know. I scrambled for the remote, heart thumping from the start and shut it off.

The cold of early winter had turned my bedroom into a fridge. 

I hurried to the window and latched it shut. It didn't matter. The air itself was freezing. But my bed was still more comfortable than the couch so I pulled myself under the chilly covers and snuggled in knowing that eventually, I would warm up.

I knew that everything was all wrong before I even opened my eyes. The chill in the air had not lessened but intensified and I was freezing cold. I couldn't breathe and when I tried to shift, my body felt so heavy.

I didn't want to look.

But my eyes opened.

And there he was. The epitome of my life; something striking, beautiful and warm, transformed into darkness. Cold steel hands clutching against soft warm skin, immobilizing me with his crushing weight. Terrifying me with blank eyes.

His touch was so cold. Colder than the new winter air and I shook as we watched each other. I trembled until my bones ached and my joints swelled with pain. Until my lungs burned with each struggled breath.

But I never looked away.

AN: More on the way! I hope you're enjoying this! <3

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