AT AGE SEVENTEEN Charlie Martin still can't forgive himself for what he's done. His sleep is haunted by memories of Daniel's face and he's still trying to find a way to punish himself for what he's done. The bruises have long since faded, Charlie's guilt still lingers. He still thinks of Finn sometimes, mainly to praise some higher being from stopping him from hurting Finn too.
AT AGE SEVENTEEN Daniel Evans is caught in the free fall once more. He swore he was never going to let someone take his heart quite like that again, at least not someone who wasn't certain what he wanted. But then Jonah Clarke came around and somehow managed to help Daniel forget all about the demons from his past.
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It's late February, a year ago. Charlie's sat in his bedroom all alone.
Charlie can't take this anymore. It's three in the morning and he's lying awake unable to sleep.
It's been over a year and he still can't fucking sleep.
Somehow, still, every time Charlie closes his eyes all he can picture is Daniel's heartbroken face. And all Charlie can think about is that he doesn't deserve to sleep. He deserves pain and misfortune and heartbreak of the most torturous kind.
And so he lies awake and stares at the glow in the dark stegosaurus above his head.
He deserves this. This lack of sleep and lack of appetite and constant headache. He deserves every bit of bad luck and bad news that comes his way.
He didn't deserve Daniel. He didn't deserve Finn. He doesn't deserve anyone.
He deserves his Father and his sharp words and his punches.
Charlie's phone vibrates on his bedside table, lighting up so that Charlie can see his entire room and so that he's forced to shield his eyes from the sudden light.
Who the hell texts at three o'clock in the morning?
Unknown: You're a dick. I hope you know that. I also hope you know that even though you did your best to ruin my life that it doesn't even fucking matter anymore because people like you are never going to change, and eventually people are going to realise what a vile person you are, and in the end people like me are going to get every fucking thing they deserve and more
Panic rises along with bile in Charlie's throat and he's not sure if he's going to throw up or scream, possibly both, possibly at the same time.
Because surely there's only one person this could be, and suddenly images of Daniel are flashing through Charlie's mind like a fucking stop-start animation in his head. And Charlie can feel every wall he's built up crumbling away all thanks to a single text.
And nothing it says surprises him, it's everything he deserves to hear. But there was a part of him that hoped maybe Daniel had forgiven him during their period of not talking.
And now that hope is dashed. No it's been ripped to shreds.
Maybe this is a wrong number kind of situation and Charlie is just panicking for no apparent reason and he knows this new hope is definitely foolish but he can't help but cling onto it because everything might be just a little bit better if he doesn't know for certain that Daniel hates him.
And Charlie has no idea how to reply and so he does the only thing he can think of.
Charlie: Sorry, who is this?
Charlie doesn't sleep at all that night as he waits up, expecting the person to reply.
He lies in his bed and imagines a thousand different scenarios. Imagines how pissed Daniel might be that Charlie is asking who it is or the fact that Charlie could be worrying over nothing, he doesn't know that it's Daniel after all.
