Scömìche One-Shots

I'm not worth waking up for.

I want to call you and talk like we always said we would.

I want to fall asleep with you, watching movies and eating cookie dough.

I can't, though.

I want to sit up on your bed having deep conversations like we used to.

Still, that's not happening anymore.

I want you to wake me up before you leave for the day like you did every morning.

I miss it.

I want to go to fun, random places like we did before.

I wish we could.

I want to stay up all night watching horror movies with you and joking about our stupidity as we hid behind our pillows.

They always said our bond was strange, how we were so close.

That's gone now.

I'm tired of always lying about how I am because I don't want to break down in front of all the people I see every day. I'm tired of being such a damn burden to everyone where I am now. I'm so tired of making everyone hate each other.

I want to be back with you, eating pizza rolls as we watch an old episode of Family Guy.

You helped me so much when I was with you, I can't believe it's only been months since I'd last seen you.

I miss the dogs. I loved how one lovingly tackled me as I went to lay in bed, and how the other just slept at my side.

I miss the long walks we'd take, and the short drives we'd make to the snow cone shop.

I miss every genuine 'I love you'. It doesn't feel the same over the phone.

I miss the look in your eyes when you said it to me. I knew it wasn't out of habit.

I miss the soft blankets I slept in, and the light glow of the television from the other room.

I miss when we went to the baseball fields to watch children's films all night on a big, wavy screen as the wind tossed it here and there.

I remember the night before I left.

We all brought our chairs to the back yard.

Just me, you, and Tori.

We set up cute tiki torches around us, it looked as if we were a tiny kingdom.

You sat in the middle.

I remember the light breeze, and how frustrated we got when the wind blew out the tiny flames.

I remember the fireflies that came out that night. They were pretty.

I remember the day I was leaving.

I remember when you broke down, helping me pack my bags because we'd put it off so long.

I remember holding you as you cried into my shoulder, unable to hold back your sobs.

I remember how I felt so loved that day. Like I had the entire time I was with you.

I remember when we got into the car, stopping along the way to get snacks.

I remember trying to stay awake on the long drive to the airport, trying to cherish every last moment I had with you.

I remember how sad you were. How you refused to let me go.

I remember walking with you to the gate, waiting for my plane to board.

I remember hugging you goodbye, before walking onto the plane.

You didn't know it, but I looked behind me.

I wish I hadn't.

You promised not to cry. I saw you wiping your eyes as you walked away.

I remember the picture you sent when I was about to land. Your eyes were very red.

I loved the picture anyway.

I remembered the calls we said we'd make every day.

I remember promising to call you no matter what time if I was feeling suicidal again.

I broke that promise, didn't I?

I cried as I'd realized you'd already be asleep. I sobbed to myself that it was too late to call. It was too late.

I know I promised to wake you up if I needed to.

Why did I break my promise?

I'm not worth waking up for.

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Hey. As you can tell this is kind of personal to me. It's supposed to seem unfinished, so you can fill in the blanks yourself. I didn't want to make it romantic, really. This is kind of a message to my mother. I know I'm a dramatic bitch, but I've been thinking about her a lot lately.

Writing is kind of my outlet, so I thought, 'What the hell, why not post a chapter about her?' Obviously what had driven me to do this isn't really hurting me too much anymore. I had a moment, I guess.

This is supposed to be scömìche, if that was unclear. I wanted to leave this blank-ish, so you could decide what their relationship is. Thank you guys for reading these, again. I don't thank y'all enough. I'll update soon, I promise.

Farewell for now 👋🏼