Sex / A. Irwin

six.

addie pov

It was the day of my party and I had to call in some reinforcements. I called Luke late last night after I went out with Ashton and he came over right away to help me figure out a music playlist, but as usual, we didn't really do that. When Luke and I get together, we always get distracted and venture off into our own things. We have 5 songs on our list and we got those down in ten minutes, now, an hour later, we're laying down naked, sweating next to each other.

"We haven't done that in a while." He said, making me laugh.

"We really haven't." I replied, looking over at him. "I think it was because we promised not to do that anymore."

He turned on his side and bit his lip, looking down at me. "It's not my fault you're so fücking sexy." He spoke. He moved some hair from my face and kissed me, slowly moving his lips against mine. I pulled away, feeling guilty for some reason. I got out of bed and slid on my clothes, Luke giving me a confused look. "What? No round two?" He asked, sitting up.

I shrugged. "I don't know, I feel guilty for some reason. I mean I was just with Ashton and now I'm here with you. It just feels... wrong." I sighed, sitting down next to Luke.

"You like Ashton, don't you?" He teased, nudging me.

I shrugged.

"Look, Ashton is one of my best friends and I love him to death, but he's an asshole to girls. My advise is to try not to get attached. He honestly told me just the other day that he wasn't interested in having a girlfriend anytime soon. He just wants sex." He spoke, making my heart drop.

I don't know what it was about Ashton, but he felt different to me. He was sweet and kind and he actually wanted to get to know me, or at least seemed like he did. Our date was supposed to end at ten, but instead I got home at 3 a.m. and we didn't even do anything sexual. All we did was kiss and talk, and I guess that's why I got such a different feeling from him.

"Should I invite Trent?" I asked Luke, trying to change the subject. He rolled his eyes.

"No, you shouldn't invite Trent. He only wants you for sex." He said, making me laugh.

"Don't you want me for the same reason?" I asked jokingly.

"Adelaide, I am offended that you would think that." He laughed. "It's your choice, if you want Trent there, invite him, but you know he's going to invite his friends."

"It's fine. Besides, I like his friends, they're funny." I smiled, pulling up Trent's number and texting him the information for my party. "I'm also gonna text his friend Jesse, too, he's really good at throwing parties and I need some help. The last time I threw a party was at my old house and now that we have a pool, it's gonna be more fun."

"Hell yeah." Luke laughed. "Alright, I'm heading off, see ya soon." He said, kissing me softly before he disappeared down the hallway.

-

Picking out an outfit for the night is the most dreadful thing I've done. I did my makeup by not using any color, I was just going to keep it neutral in hopes that it was going to help me pick out an outfit easier, but it didn't help me in the slightest way. "Fück it." I muttered to myself, pulling out a tank top and some ripped skinny jeans. I wanted to look good, but not too overdone. After all, this wasn't an award show. I slid on a pair of my favorite workout shoes and I honestly must say, I looks really good. I heard my doorbell ring and I furrowed my brow, picking up my phone and checking the time; it was 6:45 p.m.

I made my way down the stairs to answer the door, seeing Trent and Jesse standing there. "What are you guys doing here? The party doesn't start for, like, another three hours." I laughed, stepping aside and letting them in.

Trent was very tall and also very skinny. He was covered in weird tattoos, but they suited him. Jesse, on the other hand, was the opposite. Jesse had long, curly hair and was just a an inch or two taller than me. He was muscular and he had tattoos, but most of them were ones that he had to get because of a dare.

"We brought alcohol." Trent said, holding up two cases of beer. "Jesse has the liquor." He smirked, stepping closer to me, wrapping his arms around my waist. "You look so good right now." He bit his lip, trying to kiss me but I stepped out of his way, Jesse laughing.

"Trent, knock that shít off." I warned, rolling my eyes at him.

"Geez, someone's in a bad mood." He laughed, putting his beer down on the counter. "What's up, Addz? You okay?" He asked me.

I shook my head, avoiding eye contact with him. "Nothing, I'm fine." I sighed. "I'm just stressed with getting this party up and running." I sighed.

"That's why we're here. We'll help make this party kick major äss." Trent said, laughing as he put his arm around me. "I'll go grab the cooler and my friend should be here later with the keg. It'll be great, you have nothing to worry about." He patted me on the shoulder before walking away.

I hated myself for lying about how I was feeling, but I've never been the type of person to express my feelings, so keeping everything bottled up is just a coping mechanism at this point. I couldn't let Trent know that I was thinking about Ashton; I can't let anybody know. I almost felt ashamed for liking him, and I can't quite put my finger on why. There's so many factors as to why this isn't good for me. He was best friends with a guy I was hooking up with, he's a player... there's so many reasons why I shouldn't be hung up on him, but I am.

Part if me is still thinking about how horrible I felt when Luke told me he was just going to try to use me for sex. Last night felt so magical to me, it actually felt like he had a genuine interest in my ideologies and my life. He seemed so authentic. Does he do this to all the girls that he wants to get into bed with? It's elaborate and extremely repulsive, but I'm still so intrigued by him.

I don't know, maybe I just want to get my heart broken... or maybe I'm just stupid.