Captured Moments.

Ch.6 ~ Half A Heart.

"Do you miss your heartbeat?" His hot breath tickled my shoulders.

"No. Why would I?" He chuckled in disbelief.

"Heartbeats one of the few things that fascinated you Ten. I know you miss the rhythm of your own." He was right. But I couldn't tell him that. "A lot of things fascinate me now."

"Like what?" "Lights." He laughed.

"Oh stop it! You sound like a moth!" My dead heart cracked - yet again - and flaked to the bottom of my once glowing soul. "And to think, I thought you were more than a pretty dead girl." An evil snicker slid on his face. "I could just disappear forever if it'll make you feel better." Why did I think he would understand what's going on, my being dead did change him. "Forget all we said that night, it doesn't even matter, cause we both got split in two." Another cold, grey, lifeless flake of my once beating heart fell to the pit of darkness. "And I thought you were alive, a person who could go through the worst, and not fall like the others. But you did fall with me. You're dead inside." I thought his hard gaze faltered but it musn't have, he was still cold looking. What did I ever do?

~~~~~~~~

My head shot up as pain ignited in my lungs. I couldn't breath, no matter how much I tried my lungs just wouldn't open up. Tears rolled down my face as the pain spread to my bones. The cold ache hit my ribs, tingling my insides as it crawled through the gaps to my heart it's goal was to kill the warmth inside of it. But once it got there it stopped dead in its tracks, finally noticing that my heart didn't have any warmth to kill. The pain drained from me, I saw the icy blue ribbons of pain leave through my skin, allowing air to enter into my lungs.

It was getting better before today. Not once dreaming of what I never wanted to see. I thought I accepted what was going on.

I lay back in the dark, letting it envelope me.

I could hear the soft breaths of Briars next to me. She's adapted to her new life so well. So much better than I did. I swear I had nightmares and cried the nights away for the first few weeks. Could make it by herself? What if I wasn't here to help Briar in the first place? I'm sure she would still be in that dark corner crying into her shaking hands, feeling the surface of her face. Lost and alone. I'm glad I was there to help her through her tragic death.

Deep in thought, I hadn't noticed the change in scenery until now. The sad looking boy alone at the river caught my eye. Xavier was yet again trying to find comfort in the reflective water, yet failing. Next thing I knew I was sitting beside him, going unnoticed.

I absorbed his energy so easily, it wasn't going unnoticed either. As he got weaker he got stronger. I drained his energy by instinct, it's what us ghosts do.

But as I did so I slowly became visible. For awhile it didn't seem to catch his attention, until he went to leave. With one last look at the water, he saw my reflection. But this time he didn't run, he sat back down beside me.

"Tenley, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to do what I did." He didn't do anything but find me on the verge of death. He saved me in a way. "You didn't do anything but save me Xav." He looked so vulnerable looking at the water. "But I let you leave after dark, you said you only wanted to go for a walk, get fresh air, but after half an hour I got worried. Not long after I found you face down in the lake. Only only an inch of water separated us yet you seemed so distant. And seeing the life drain out of your eyes just broke me."

He did look quite broken every time I saw him. "And being here without you is like I'm waking up to only half of the sky, kind of there but not quite. I'm walking round with just one shoe. I'm half a heart without you. I'm half a man at best with half an arrow in my chest. I miss everything we do. I'm half a heart without you, Tenley."

Tears pricked at his eyes and he struggled not to let them go. "Remember, when we could spare an hour or so, we'd go for lunch down by the river."

It made me start to cry. He never actually changed, he just broke inside, just like I had. "Though I try to get you out of my head, the truth is I got lost without you." And his eyes showed it.

"But I never truly left you Xav. I've been here the whole time, trying to get you to see me. Here, at the beach, everywhere. When you need me, I'm her. I did say I would never leave you didn't I?" His head shot up to where I should've been sitting but I knew he couldn't see me. "I could just reach out and touch you, Ten."

"You can see me?" He looked puzzled.

"Yeah, course I can." I felt like at that time I could break into pieces from trauma if that was even possible. I thought it would drop when I died but I think the load just worsened. "I want you to see me, so you can."

He went to reach out for my face carefully, and I let him. He would either pass straight through me or his hand would touch my cheek. I closed my eyes, worried I wouldn't feel his touch. But when I felt warmth envelope my face my eyes shot open revealing a happy Xavier.

It had been so long since I had seen him smile. Even his eyes had the long gone colour splattered through them. I swear we looked like a pair of lunatics but the only living person who still had hope in me just found me again.

"I've missed your touch Xav." I wrapped my icy fingers around his wrist.

"I missed yours too Ten. Although yours is eerily colder than normal."

"I don't get the gift of warmth anymore Xavier. I'm still dead." His eyes became grey again. "Don't look at me like that Xav." His hand left my face and he pulled his wrist from my grip.

"It's cold enough out here." I was ready to break, but I promised myself I wouldn't break in front of him again. " I miss you, Xav, please don't block me out. I might not be back for awhile." I could feel his disappointment but not in me, in himself.

"Ten before you go. I believe we're all here for a reason. You were here for me, and even after death you're still here. I believe I'm here to help you. And even after death, i'll do that."

He leaned into me and gave me the slightest of kisses on my lips. It may not have compared to the quality of the kisses he used to give to me but this one spread the lost warmth through my body, shaking the dream form earlier and fighting the permanent ache of the icy cold temperature inside of me.

He held me close, both of our eyes closed waiting for a response. Until he spoke. "We are on fire." With that, he vanished form under my touch.