Consequences |LRH|

Chapter 17

Trigger Warning: There are some parts in this chapter that some people may find triggering,  the main triggers are violence and non consensual drug use. Please do not read if you are not comfortable with these things. 

Evie

The walk to the party was effortless, or at least it seemed like it was. We all talked like we had known each other our entire lives. I guess they had, actually. Watching Luke so comfortable in his own skin was nice, the slight smile etched onto his lips and his eyes catching mine only to roll at every dumb thing his friends said. If I let myself dwell on it, I definitely could panic about him finding me the way he did; zoned out and ready for a nice, long panic attack but it was Luke. And as ridiculous as it sounded, even in my own head, I knew that he would never judge me for listening just a little too loudly to the voices in my head. I could panic later, now it was time to get drunk.

My heels clacked rhythmically against the cracked pavement, laughter spilling from my lips as Michael and Calum challenged each other to see who could walk backwards the best. I found myself sandwiched between the walls that were Ashton and Luke, a range of conversations flowing in the short walk from not letting me be harassed by paparazzi which Luke was quite serious about to whether or not the fact penguins have wings was extra or not because they couldn't fly.

I was comfortable, opening up in a way that I hadn't before as I told them about my aunt taking me to the beach. I was young, dumb enough to walk backwards in the sand towards the ocean so I could talk with my aunt only for a huge wave to lap the shores, crashing onto my head. I could barely get the story out, laughing to hard at all the pictures my brother had taken of me dunked under the wave, sprawled on the sand, and then staring at him with a mouthful of it. Michael and Calum stared at me before shouting over the other how they couldn't believe I was 'stupid enough' to walk backwards into the ocean. Then Michael tripped over one of the cracks in the sidewalk and they were quick to shut up. Ashton and Luke were sympathetic they knew what it was like as did the other two but the alcohol seemed to have stunted their ability to sympathise. I wasn't fussed by it, it was hilarious.

It was then that Luke had began to gently ghost his hand over mine, his fingertips a gentle comfort as my fingertips brushed the back of his hand. The first time he'd done it, I had jumped practically out of my skin. It was unexpected, especially when the two drunkards were still facing he and I. I chalked it to being an accident, we were walking awfully close but a few more times of 'accidental' brushing had me giving him a look.

When his bright blue eyes met mine, I could tell he wanted to hold my hand. I couldn't disagree with him; a strong, compelling feeling to take hold of his large hand, to let him pull me into his side was aching within me. My heart raced, thumping louder and faster in my chest when one of his pinkies linked with mine and it felt like my heart would burst from my chest. A small voice gently coaxed a word that I hadn't dared to think, figuring he'd get tired of me before then.

Boyfriend.

I wanted Luke to be my boyfriend as much as I wanted to be his girlfriend. I knew he'd had plenty of opportunities to ask me if he really wanted to but another voice told me that I'd had just as many to ask him. Who was I kidding? I wasn't going to ask him, not when I already thought he was so far out of my league. But I couldn't help feeling like every time we're alone together it felt official, like we were an impenetrable, sturdy wall. Like we could do anything as long as we had each other. We were just out complete selves, all of our strengths melded into a stronger, confident relationship but caring for the other despite our still obvious faults. I didn't know if he would ask me, or if he was waiting for me to ask him but I didn't want to lose him; that was for sure.