One step forward, two steps back.
This is the story of my life. Every time I think im making progress, or moving past my memories, I seem to get farther lost in my nightmares. Every time I think I've finally found the road I'm supposed to follow, I end up in the middle of the forest once again.
Why even try to keep going? Every time I try I end up even worse than I was before. And every unanswered question makes every decision even harder than it was before.
Time feels like it is passing me by faster everyday, but somehow it is never fast enough. The memories from yesterday always can keep up. No matter how long I try to deny the truth, it always will catch up.
Well. Tonight the memories have caught up, and they are threatening to push me off the edge. The memories end goals are just. Peaceful. Calm. Even though the means are horrible and full of dread. However, if I try to fight, I just prolong this process of dread and pain. The end will come eventually. Death is inevitable obviously. But how long will I decide to fight this inevitability? And why do I fight at all? Because some priest says it is wrong to put an end to immense pain and fear? Because of all the people who will be "hurt" by the decision? Nobody cares. Very few people actually care anymore in the world. And I know almost none of those people.
So when people pretend that there is some simple path to follow in life, I ask them a one worded question.
Where.
Where is this magical path? In my world, no such thing exists.
But again, I open my window and answer my phone, to make sure the words haven't changed. Mockingly the chant continues.
Just follow the path.
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Depression Of the Worst Degree
NouvellesIm not entirely certain what this collection would qualify as. This is a blend of poetry, short stories, quotes, and etc. That I believe best describe depression. My hope is that maybe I can help connect with others who feel the same way as I do. I...