Invisible Pain

Chapter Twenty

    Several weeks have past and there was some significant improvement in Karissa. She has tried many antidepressants but finally has found one medication that suited her best. She often made frequent visits to see Dr. Ryan. Ever since she had a fight with Trevor back at his house, she hasn't spoken to him and he has never cared to call her back. Karissa tried really hard to not let that bother her since Dr. Ryan told her he wasn't worth her time.
    Her urgencies to cut were starting to become minimal and she began going to support groups that do talk about self-harm. She felt that she more alive than ever and decided to quit her job as at the law firm since she knew it wouldn't be the same for her after the incident. She started to take her Secretary experience to a doctor's office instead where it was much closer for her from her apartment. Her and Whitney still kept in touch and it didn't take long for them to become best friends. Karissa was worried that Whitney would never speak to her despite everything that has happened but to her surprise, Whitney was supportive and wasn't going to leave Karissa's side.
    She was calling her parents more and more, telling them both that she is doing well and Trevor is no longer in the picture. She decided to not go explain in detail what everything has had happened to her. Her parents could both tell that their daughter has never sounded so happy in her life. Karissa felt that she could take that breath of fresh air. She disposed all of her sharp objects in the garbage and threw it in the garbage bin and anything that would remind her of Trevor.
    "I can see how happy you really are my dear." Says Dr. Ryan to Karissa during one of their sessions, "Yes oh my god, you have no idea. Just when you thought you could battle Depression alone, you don't realize how much support you really need.", "You are correct, I'm so glad that you are starting to improve. Have you done any cutting lately?". Karissa shows Dr. Ryan both of her arms and they were nothing but old scars. "That's amazing, I'm so proud of you Karissa. You have showed me that you're a very strong woman that can conquer the world.", "Yes it sure does feel that way...".
    While at work, Karissa was talking to a group of women that she soon became friends with quickly about how hilarious they had found American Reunion while watching at the Theatre the night before. "Oh my god, I thought I was going to piss myself at the very beginning of the movie!" Cried one of the girls, "I nearly choked on my Pepsi!" Laughed Karissa, "We totally need to do more of these movie dates involving no guys whatsoever!". Then all of a sudden Karissa's iPhone starts to vibrate and told the girls she has got to go take this text as she knows Whitney would text her since both of their lunchtime are the same in time consistency.
    Karissa's presses the home button on the phone and saw an unusual, yet familiar number that almost didn't ring a bell for her. The text ended up saying "I saw you at the movies ;) ". Karissa soon started to panic knowing she has a stalker but quickly realizes it may have been Whitney. Just as soon she was about to text her, she realized that if Whitney was at the movies, she would of approached her group but then again Whitney was invited but couldn't make it since she was sick that night. Oh fuck, I think I know who it is!
"What does it matter to you that I was there? Maybe I wasn't there after all!" She texted Trevor, "I care because I was there darling for your FYI and don't lie because I had saw you there!", "Fuck off and leave me alone jerk!". Karissa shuts her iPhone off and walks back to her friends. They all immediately saw Karissa's sad expression, "Hey, are you okay girlfriend?" Number One asks, Yeah I'm fine.", "You don't look fine." Number Two says, "No seriously, you guys I'm fine, look at me!". The rest of the group shut out and Karissa apologizes to the five women and walks away saying "Excuse me".
Karissa walks outside barely holding onto the tears she has been wanting to let out ever since she had shut off her phone. Her breathing soon started to escalate, rocking herself back and forth. She starts to fidget and soon began scratching her inner arms and began to feel shaky.
"Why the hell can I not be left alone??"