imagines ◦benny rodriguez / luis mendoza

shut up and kiss me ◦ benny rodriguez

HEY PEEEEPS
I haven't edited this so if it sucks, my bad.
PLEAAAAASE GIVE ME FEEDBACK
let me know if I should do anything different or something. I NEED SOME EXCITEMENT IN MY LIFE

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The melancholy atmosphere that lingered throughout my house had become all too familiar. I found security in it. It didn't matter though, happiness had become uncomfortable, it never seemed to stay.

The feeling of never being at home in my own house eventually got the best of me. I knew nothing would ever be the same. I was lost and had no where to go.

I took note of the endless bills and papers that were scattered across the kitchen table, along with an ashtray and a pair of glasses. I sighed, remembering how stressed my father had become.

Ever since it happened, he was restless. He was constantly working, so I wasn't seeing much of him, but he was trying so hard to be strong for my sake. And I appreciated that more than he'd ever know.

The familiar, and oddly comforting scent of tobacco filled my nose as I entered the living room. My father sat in his red recliner with a pile of notes beside him. His glasses slid slightly down his nose and his pipe balanced on his bottom lip as he studied the paper in his hands. He seemed busy so not wanting to disrupt him, I turned back toward the hallway.

"Ellie."
I turned back around to meet his tired eyes, and raised my eyebrows in response.

"Dinner is on the table." he said, his voice weary. I knew he was drained. But I also knew that money was tight, and working morning and night wasn't a choice he'd made.

I nodded once and watched his chest rise as he inhaled, breathing in the pipes warmth.

"You know I love you, kid." He said, now exhaling a stream of smoke. I ignored him, watching as the grey cloud disappeared into the dim living room light. I hated this time of day, everything felt so dull.

"You know that right?" I heard him ask, my eyes advertise to his gaze. "Huh- Oh yeah, I know. love you too." I said, before giving him a half hearted smile and turning on my heels to exit the room.

My father and I rarely talked as much as we did before it happened. Matter of fact, we barely talked as it was. Don't get me wrong, I loved the man to death. He was just always so busy, and sometimes it just hurt to look at him.

Watching him go from the energetic, happy-go-lucky, father figure that he once was to this, was so difficult.

I made my way through the silent hallway and eventually reached my bedroom door. I hesitated, looking toward the closed door diagonal from mine, haunted by the memories behind it.

Images of my older brother and I sitting on the carpeted floor of his bedroom burned into my mind. We'd sit in there for hours, talking about anything and everything. God, I missed him so much.

I shook my head, as if it would dispose of the memory forever and opened my door only to be greeted by a pillow, hitting me right in the face.

"What the fu-" "Hey stranger." the familiar but distant sound of a friends voice made my heart pulse once, I hadn't spoken to him in weeks, months even.

"Benny? How did you even ge-"

"You know," he spoke slowly before standing up from my bed, then walked over to my window. "You should really get the lock on this thing fixed, could be dangerous. You know, like a predator or someone crazy could get in." His fingers moved along the top of the window, stopping as he turned back to face me. "You've seen those crime shows, or read about them at least, right? It always ends up being some crazy relative. Same damn thing every time." he shook his head, walking away from the window and over toward my desk.