Terrible Habits

Repeating History.

Luke

"What the hell was that?" I hear Jay ask as he pulls a shirt on when I shut the door after Lenny leaves. Lenny.

"What?" I feel my eyebrows pull together, not understanding the question.

"You're helping her get a job and an apartment? What was she? The best sex you've ever had?"

I roll my eyes, grabbing my pack of cigarettes from the counter as I make my way to the balcony. Jay never knew when to shut up. 

"No, I'm serious, cause if she was, let me get some of that," he smiles and I turn to punch him, but he dodges it. "Easy, easy," he laughs, putting his hands up and backing up. "You know I'm kidding."

I take a long drag from the cigarette and exhale.

"Nevermind, forget I even brought it up. You wanna come to the gym with me today?"

"Nah, I have to pick up Sam," I say, putting my cigarette out just as quickly as I grabbed one.

"Ah yeah, that's right. He coming over tonight?" Jay rubs the back of his neck, obviously wondering if he could bring someone back.

"No, just for the day."

"Sweet, I'll see ya after work," he calls waving over his shoulder, shutting the door behind him.

I lean against he railing of the balcony, grateful that it isn't raining...yet. I don't know what crazy is, but I'm pretty sure it was me just offering to help Lenny. Lenny, I thought. That name definitely fits her more than Eleanor. I smile, imagining her being referred to as Eleanor, I'm sure that was something she is called by her family.

Her family.

What am I doing?

Helping her out for a night sure, promising to help her turn her life around? That puts me in dangerous waters. I know what kind of people the Maloney's are and I know what they were capable, but she is different. She has to be.

I check my watch and run inside to grab my car keys, hoping that I'm too late, picking up Sam.

It's raining by the time I get there and traffic had been a bitch. I get out of the car and run to the apartment in an effort to avoid getting wet though it was an impossibility.

I knock on the door and just like it always happened, memories from my childhood came rushing back to me. I close my eyes and re-open them when I hear the door open, Sam standing in its place, a big smile on his face.

"Hey little man," I extend my hand and he slaps it.

"I'm not little," his eyebrows pull together and I laugh.

"Maybe not anymore." I look around him into the dilapidated, run down apartment. "Mom home?" my voice becomes hard as I watch Sam's face fall.

"Nah, she left last night," he says, turning around to lock the door behind him. I clench my teeth, trying not to think about it and throw a smile on my face when he turns back to face me.

"Quincy's?" I ask and the smile on his face grows. "Let's go kid," I hook my arm around his neck, leading him to the car and leaving my past behind me.

I had been coming to Quincy's since my father was around. It had always been our favorite place to go. Now it is Sam and mine's. I grab the booth on the side, pressed up against the window and lean against it. I watch Sam settle in, unloading his books and papers from his backpack.

I was fourteen when my dad died and Sam was only a newborn. Sam and I had different childhoods. I grew up idolizing my father and then just like that he was gone. My mother was then in charge of the rent, the bills, school, us. My mother turned to drinking and other un-mentionable ways of earning the rent. I wanted to keep Sam away from that as much as possible, so most weekends that I had off, I take him away. No one needed to grow up in that environment, but she never really let me take him away. If I had it my way Sam would live with me and away from the hellhole that she created, but it wasn't that easy.

I had to make amends too, we both lost ourselves when we lost Dad, at least I am trying to pick myself up.

Sam looked like my father. He has the same light color hair, the same eyes, the same splash of freckles on his cheeks under his eyes and across his nose. I didn't look anything like him. My darker hair and features came from my mother's side.

"So what's on the agenda for today?"

"Algebra," he grimaces, flipping through the pages of his textbook.

"That's not that bad," I say, but I sympathize with him. I always hated math.

"You boys want the regular?" I look up to see, Georgia, our usual waitress on Saturday mornings.

"Yes please," Sam says smiling.

We spend the next few hours of the afternoon looking over math problems and preparing him for his test later this week. I rub the back of my neck, my eyes going weary from lack of sleep. I didn't mind sleeping on the floor though, if that meant that she was in the same room.

"Why do you keep doing that?" Sam asks, snapping me out of my daydream.

"What?"

"You keep checking your phone every five minutes." He states matter-of-factly.

"I'm waiting for a call," I explain.

"Oh is it a girl?" he makes a kissy face and I laugh.

"Maybe," I lean back against the booth.

"Girls are gross," he sticks his tongue out as my phone rings. I glance down at the screen expecting to see her name light up, but instead it is my mother's. I suck in a deep breath and answer.

"Luca, is Sam with you?" I hear her voice on the other line and it is faded.

"Yeah, Ma, its Saturday," I explain for the hundredth time.

"Saturday?" she questions. Almost every week for the past three years I had taken Sam on Saturday's and she still couldn't remember the time of day. "You bring him back here!"

"Ma," I start but shes cut me off, her voice full of anger.

"He is my son Luca, you bring him back here! I don't need your help," it sounds like her voice is thick with tears. So no matter how much I hated myself for complying with her demands, I feel pity for her and for Sam and I don't know which way to choose.
"He'll be home in an hour," I say, shutting the phone off before she could argue.

"Is mom back?" I hear Sam ask in a small voice.

"Yeah," I pinch the bridge of my nose.

"Do I have to go back?"

"Not yet," I promise. "You ready?" I ask getting up and throwing money down on the table to pay for the food.

"Where are we going?" he asks, slipping the straps of his backpack on his shoulders.

"We're going to see Hollis."

"Yes!" Sam jumps up and down as we leave the restaurant and filter into the rain.

Hollis is one of my oldest friends from school. She lives right inside city limits in a fairly decent apartment for Seattle. But I know that she is looking for a roommate ever since what's her face moved out. Hollis had settled quickly for a roommate right after she moved out of her house. Turned out that she didn't have a steady income and couldn't pay the bills and started turning towards bad habits, Hollis offered her her help or she was gone. That was months ago and we hadn't seen her since. Maybe she could help Lenny in another way too...

I knock three times of the door, as Sam rocks back and forth on his heels, eager to see one of his best friends.

"What do you want?" Hollis answers the door, her red hair looking even brighter than usual today. I motion down to Sam who smiles. "I mean, hi," she throws a smile on her face and pops her bubble gum.

"You still looking for a roommate?" I ask.