The Awkward Boy.

Avoidance.

      -Time lapse- sorry.

     It had been two weeks since the first day of the tenth grade, and still not much at all had changed. I still had made no friends, all the guys were still jerks, and I couldn't fuckin get Jesse out of my head. I hadn't spoken a word to him since I tripped over his sneakers that first day. But that didn't stop me from thinking about him every second of the day.  I hated myself. It was like I didn't have any self control. Why couldn't I be normal?

   Over the course of the past two weeks I had taken to avoiding Jesse. It wasn't that hard of a feat, he had plenty a friends, it wasn't like he came running up to me everyday to talk. But if he would I wouldn't trust myself not to say something stupid and make a complete idiot of myself.

   So here I found myself, on a Thursday afternoon, during lunch hour, in the men's room with my tray of food in my lap. In order to avoid Jesse of course I couldn't just eat in the cafeteria. I wished I wouldn't care so much because eating in the men's room sucks.

   You hardly want to eat your food in a stall someone was shitting  in less than five minutes before.

   I had lost my appetite long before that though, it was when Toby, a boy from my homeroom had thrown a bottle at the back of my head so hard that it made a loud popping noise. I groaned in pain rubbing my neck while he and his dumb friends laughed behind me. And with my luck Jesse had heard the sound he turned around his eyes meeting mine for the first time since the first day. Their was this look in his eyes that I couldn't describe. They were so tender and soft. I had tore my eyes away abruptly while my cheeks heated up. I didn't need his pity.

   I cringed back at the moment before standing up and walking out of the men's room to dump my plate. I walked quickly out of the cafeteria and into the west courtyard.

  I had grown to love this place. It was really beautiful with shaded benches oak trees and a great view of the football field and it hardly ever had anyone in it at this part of the day. Right now their was nobody in sight so I went to one of the benches and sat down to do my biology homework.

   As soon as I had pulled out my binder though I heard something. I stood up to see what it was and my stomach dropped to my feet. It was Toby and two of his meathead friends quickly approaching me, the only one else there. They were too close now for me to run so I just said a quick silent prayer instead. Something like, " God, please let them leave me with my four limbs and eyesight."  

   "Hey faggot." One of his dumbass friends chanted in a low, patronizing voice. Fear seized up in my throat and I couldn't breath. I new these were the beginnings of an anxiety attack so I took a couple steps back until the back of my knees hit the bench I had been sitting at. They gathered around me blocking my view of the cafeteria door, and my only exit. I was screwed to say the least.

  "W-what do you want?" I said attempting to sound authoritative but my voice just sounded meek. They laughed loudly and my heart pounded in my ears.

  "T-t-to beat the shit out of you." Toby said mocking my stuttering voice. His friends laughed once again.

   Without anymore preamble Toby grabbed the front of my hoodie and his fist connected with my jaw. My vision blacked out for a second and my jaw began to throb. Without anytime for me to think, his other friend grabbed me and punched me in the lip with more force than Toby had. It knocked me backward and I landed hard on my ass. I turned my head and spit out blood on the concrete.

 I was livid, I hated them so much. In a rush of adrenaline I scrambled up and punched Toby roughly in the temple then I spun around and punched his friend with so much force my knuckles split.