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» fifth

[ fallen malarkies ]

today fortunately or unfortunately I cannot say for Victor Meyer helped me again. this time when a pile of books stacked up like a toy tower fell from my hands like crumbling bricks. loose sheets scattered like dandelion seeds in the wind and I heard pagan laughter. my ears were painted crimson, I'm sure. yet he came to help me does he even know me? or is he an angel in disguise helping those in dire need? his warm fingertips brushed my palms as he handed me the fallen malarkies. a stray sheet I wish he had never graced his warm fingers on flickered like a broken headlight on the dark linoleum floor. juvenile words written on the corner of the sheet in neon ink gleamed like evil eyes

"his eyes they haunt me
i wish he knew me
i wish he would know
how beautiful we could be
together with his hand in mine."

I cursed and snatched it from his large hands almost tearing the paper like how my heart was slowly tearing when he just shrugged and walked away without even a slight care. should I be pleased that he doesn't care I'm different? or should i be upset he didn't bother to ask why I was born this way. maybe I should just be happy that for a second his soulful eyes looked into mine.

☀