I Can't Change {harry styles 1D}

Chapter 16- The Truth

Just a quickie. On Chapters 1, 2, 3, 10 and 12, I attached the photos of my cast for each of the characters, so check them out to see what each character looks like PLEASE. Thanks. Enjoy the story :D

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ARI'S POV-

I can't change. I can't escape from the voices in my head telling me the truth, that I'm nothing but a burden, I'm ugly, fat. I want to change, for the better. But I can't. No one deserves to live with me, no one. Especially not Elle. She has done enough for me. I walked back into the living room, grabbing a random peice of paper and a pen.

Dear Elle,

Thank you so much for everything you have done for me. For offering to let me live with you, I can't express how much I thank you. But I can't live here, knowing I'm being nothing but a burden. Knowing you have to deal with the mess I am, day after day. I'll stay at a hotel, get a job, get an apartment. I'll be fine. Letting another person I love go, it won't be easy for me. So don't make it harder by trying to come find me. I need to let you go. I can't hurt and burden someone else. I love you Elle, and I'll be fine. Maybe some day we will meet again. But until then I will never forget you. Live with your life, fall in love, be happy. Don't let me hold you down. I can't thank you enough. I love you like a sister and you will always be a part of me.

Lots of Love, Ari xx

I'm doing the right thing. I may not care about myself anymore, why would I? I'm ugly, fat, stupid, naive. The list goes on. But I care about Elle. I care about Harry and Indie and Candy. And if throwing myself away will help them, will make their lives easier, then that is exactly what I will do. Elle is at work, and when she comes home she will be free from me. I sound like I know what I'm doing in the letter, but I don't. I don't want to go to a hotel, have to watch people around me judge me and hate me. I'm too weak, I'm too broken to go through it all. Maybe spending the night in the streets, in the fresh air, will bring me back to my senses. Will clear my mind of the heartbreak, the pain, the hatred. Maybe the voices will leave me, and I can be at peace. It's a much better idea than staying here and hating myself every minute for it. I gathered my things, borrowing a coat and gloves from Elle. She would think it is her fault otherwise if I died from hypothermia. My phone was still blowing up from mentions, the last message convincing me even more to throw myself onto the streets.

Nobody wants you, and why would they? You are nothing but a disgrace, a bitch. An ungrateful little peice of shit that everyone is stuck with. A disease. Leave us all alone, go somewhere else, where no one will have to deal with your pathetic shit. I feel sorry for the bugs that have to deal with your presence. Kill yourself, rot on a bench and we will thank the Lord for getting rid of his worst mistake.

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HARRY'S POV-

I had gone through the whole airport, not getting mobbed once. That was a first. I was wearing a disguise, and I didn't have the boys with me so that explains it. I wouldn't have recognised myself if I looked in the mirror! I left the boys a letter, explaining why I disappeared. I need to see Ari. I don't care what happened, but I can't let her sit in hospital and think no one cares about her. Because I do. And I haven't stopped caring about her and loving her, even if I wanted to. I boarded the plane, a million thoughts running through my head, I was getting dizzy again. It happened every few minutes, side affects of hitting your head on concrete. I was still getting called by management and the boys every second. I didn't answer. I know we have a billion things to do as tomorrow we are supposed to leave Europe and go to LA, but I am sick so I would've just been a be a pain to drag around. I'm just going to meet them in LA, the night before our first show. Sure I'll miss a few rehersals, but Ari is more important to me, as much as I hate admiting it.