Till World's End [Skylar's Story//The maze runner (death cure) fanfic]

5. Failure

Mallory is here. I know it, I heard her voice, along with Brenda's. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what that means.

Minho did not come alone.

The thought makes me sick, and I punch the back wall of my cell, driving my fist into the concrete. I remember doing this in the maze, using the pain to relieve the anger. I would punch the maze walls until my knuckles bled. Minho hated it when I did that, and would always stop me.

Minho.

I break into sobs again, this time fueled by heartbreak mixed with anger. How could he bring them back? I'd sacrificed my safety to warn them, and yet they'd come back anyways. I thought he would know better, better than to risk the entire group for me. It was stupid. Knowing everyone is here, I let myself miss them, and the pain is crushing.

The sobs continue, until I hear the door click. It swings open, and my suspicion is confirmed. Brenda walks in, keys in hand.

"Hey Sky." She says, when she gets to the doors of my cell. Though she can't see my face, I know she can tell I'm crying. Her voice is gentle, and it surprises me.

"What?" I mumble, not bothering to turn around.

"It's over, it's time to come out, you'll be reunited with everyone."

Her words shock me into turning around, questions consuming me. Her face morphs into something between shock and horror when she sees me, and I don't blame her. I can only imagine how awful I look.

"After you take a shower that is."

"So, I'm really going to see everyone?" I ask, my voice coming out raspy and choked. I try to wipe the tears from my eyes, but it's pointless. The thought of being reunited with everyone is just too much.

She nods and smiles, "it's really over."

I find that hard to believe, but done or not, I just want to see everyone. I desperately wish they weren't here, but since they are, I might as well see them.

"Let's go." Brenda says, beginning to unlock the door. It's time to put the sadness away. I take a deep breath, close my eyes, and begin counting.

One... Feel the full pain of everything I've been through.

Two... Remember everyone we've lost, and everyone I miss

Three.... Take everything, every emotion, and lock it in a box.

Four.... Shove the box deep down, far away until another time.

Five... Open my eyes, and move on.

This has become my habit, my way of dealing with the crippling feelings that threaten to drown me.

Brenda has finished opening the door and lets me out, no guards, no chains, just me. I walk beside her in silence as she leads me down the hall, and once again I'm amazed at how fast things can change here.  She leads in me into a small room lined with showers. At the end of each stall is a small chair holding a pile of clothing and two towels.

"Hurry up, and just come back out when you're done." She says, pointing to the door behind her, "oh and don't try anything, you're still being watched."

"Of course." I state bluntly, not having expected anything else. WICKED would never just let me leave.

Brenda leaves and I make my way to the shower, fiddling with the knobs before figuring it out. I rip off my disgusting clothes, discarding them on the floor without a second thought. The hot water feels incredible, as it washes away months worth of dirt and grime. I pretend the water is my worry and pain, being washed away and sucked down a drain, never to be seen again. My hair takes the longest, each matted knot having to be ripped out by hand, before I can smooth it into a shining waterfall of red.

I hear Brenda yelling at me to hurry up through the door, and let out an annoyed sigh. After all they've put me through, surely I deserve more than a fifteen minute shower? Begrudgingly I climb out, slipping on the fresh clothes, a white t-shirt and black jeans, and drying my hair the best I can. It's still damp when I head out, but there's not much I can do.

"You took forever." Brenda says, once I finally emerge from the room.

I turn to glare at her, "you know what? I didn't see you laying in a jail cell this morning, so shut up."

She gives me a regretful look, but I brush it off, waving a hand in the air, "let's just go."

She nods and starts down the hall again. I'm half nervous to meet the group again, though I don't know why. I'd spent nearly everyday of the last few months with them, and formed friendships stronger than steel, what did I have to worry about? Deep down I knew what I was worried about, but I didn't want to admit it. Not yet.

Brenda pauses in front of a set of double doors, and I find myself bouncing on the balls of my feet, waiting impatiently for her to open them. It reminds me of the days I spent waiting for the maze doors to open, which comforts me, oddly enough. As bad as things were in the maze, at least they were predictable, normal even. You had a pattern, a schedule, you got used to it, knew what to expect. Here, I had no idea what would happen.

Finally Brenda manages to get her code to work, and the doors pop. She pulls them open, and I'm struck with the strange urge to take off running. The urge to be anywhere but here. What is wrong with me?

But I know what's wrong.

I've failed, and I don't know how to face my failure.

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A/N here:

Haven't had one of these in a while lol. Anyways, just wanted to say thanks to everyone who's stuck with this story!

Also, I re-wrote chapter 2. Concrete and Evidence, so go check it out if you have the time!