absolutely wonderful [joshler]

seize

"tyler?" josh asks on the car ride to school the next day. "are you doing okay?"

"what? oh, yeah."

"come on, cut the crap. i know when something's bothering you."

i sigh. "it's my dad. he came over last night and said some stupid things and my mom got all mad."

"is that it?"

"no, but that's all i'm going to tell you."

for once, josh nods once and leaves it at that.

"well, i know something that'll cheer you up," he says. "there's gonna be a winter prom and i'm going to take you."

"wow, uh, that's pretty straightforward," i say. "aren't you supposed to ask first? what if i don't want to go?"

"sorry, tyler," he smiles. "it's non-optional. besides, you'd never say no to that."

"very true. when is this prom?" i ask.

"tonight."

my eyes widen. "tonight? josh, i don't have a suit or anything, you can't expect me to-"

"chill, ty," he mutters. "i've got a suit at home from my cousin's wedding. trust me, you'll look great. in fact," he says, kissing the top of my hand. "you'll be the prettiest boy there."

"this must be one heck of a suit."

"it's served me well," josh shrugs. "but it'll serve you better."

_______

"have you put it on yet?" josh asks from the other side of the bathroom door.

"yeah," i call back. "i'm trying to-ugh-get my freaking cannula-okay." i open the door and pose for josh.

"aw, baby, you look so good!" josh wraps his arms around me.

"thank you," i mutter. "you look good, too."

josh wears the exact same thing as i am: your generic tuxedo with a black sparkley bow tie. his cousin must have had a laid back wedding.

i put my backpack on my back and sigh. it annoys me that i can't wear a tuxedo to prom without wearing my backpack. i can't ever be normal because of this stupid thing, but i'd rather wear it than not. if i didn't, i wouldn't have oxygen and then i would die. which is not good.

"you ready to go?" josh asks.

"my mom is gonna take a bunch of pictures," i grumble. "you should see how many pictures she has of her at prom."

"i heard the word pictures!" my mother hollers from downstairs. "come down here so i can take some!"

we comply, walking down the stairs hand-in-hand.

"ooh!" my mother squeals, taking out her camera. "you two look so adorable!"

"not exactly what i was going for here, mom."

"what, is that some sort of taboo?"

i roll my eyes. "being called adorable is for little kids."

"so, if i called you adorable," josh pipes up. "you wouldn't like it?"

"not the same thing," i mutter. "can we take these pictures and go?"

my mother has us stand against the door and smile. "say cheese!" she takes a bunch of pictures, each from a different angle and with different lighting. when she's done a few minutes later, she sends us out the door. "remember to have fun!"

almost twenty minutes later, we arrive at the high school auditorium, where there's already hundreds of people and loud music playing.

"this is wild," i shout over the music. "but i like it."

"see? i told you you'd have fun," josh smirks.

"actually, you never said that-"

he cuts me off by pressing his lips to mine.

"josh!" i shriek, stressing my throat and lungs. "there're people watching!"

he shrugs. "everybody's here with their date. not like they're seeing anything new." josh drags me out onto the dance floor, bringing my hands up onto his shoulders. "relax, ty. we're supposed to be having fun, remember?"

right when he says the word fun, that's when i feel it. my chest. it starts aching all over, and it's excruciating. i've had chest pains before, but nothing like this. i lean on josh, trying not to collapse onto the floor.

my chest keeps hurting, which is strange, because it usually only lasts for a few seconds. but the pain persists, my lungs desperately trying to find air.

and that's when my fun and relaxing night ends. i start coughing again, and to everyone's surprise but mine, blood comes up.

"tyler!" i hear josh scream, and that's the last thing i remember before falling to my feet.