In the Middle

Chapter Eleven

     I rushed out of the Big House and searched for Percy. When I found him, I hurriedly explained Mavis's absence.

     "It's okay, I'll help you look." My heart bounded as I recalled Piper's disappearance that had ended up with her dead, floating in the river. I nodded and brushed stray hairs from my face.

     "Okay. I'll look for her in the woods first." Percy agreed and I could tell he knew what I was thinking. As we split up, Percy heading towards Mavis's cabin, me towards the woods, I started to feel annoyed. By the time I reached the river, I was fuming, all the while fear was overwhelming me. I breathed a sigh of relief when Mavis was nowhere to be found near the river. I wandered through the woods for quite along time until I heard a twig snap. I whipped around in the direction from which the noise had come and was shocked to see a girl, not Mavis, staring me in the face. I was unarmed, but pretty skilled in the physical combat. Hoping my training would be enough, I spoke. "Who are you?" The girl had short, jet black hair and smoky eyes the color of slate.

     "My name is Alexis." I raised an eyebrow. "My...dad sent me here for the summer." I looked at her with an are-you-crazy look.

      "It's not summer." I said drily. Alexis crossed her arms.

     "Yeah, well, here I am." Her expression was sour and I immediately disliked this girl.

     "Fine. Follow me. If you see a dirty blonde girl say something." I turned around and started heading back to camp.

     "Something." I looked over my shoulder at Alexis. She smirked.

     "Excuse me?" Alexis dropped her hands at her side's and approached me.

     "You said to say something when I saw a girl with dirty blonde hair, yes?" I sighed, blowing the stray hairs that hung in my face. I nodded quickly. "If I'm not wrong, you're a girl, with dirty blonde hair." I glared at her.

     "Not me of course! Now, follow me, or die trying to get where you need to go." I turned back around and started the trek back to camp. I climbed over fallen trees and side-stepped overgrown roots that jut out from the ground.

     "Hey!" I heard Alexis call from over my shoulder. I glanced at her, she was struggling to get over a thick log. I retreated and helped her up and over the tree trunk. "Thanks." Alexis mumbled under her breath. "How do you do that?"

     "What?" I wasn't in the mood for another pointless conversation.

     "Climb over stuff and all that while in a ball gown with no shoes and look all nice while doing all of it."

     "It's a gift." I replied, sarcasm oozing from my voice. We walked in silence until we were back at camp. "Here we are." Alexis nodded and scanned the camp. "Follow me." I found Connor Stoll in his cabin and directed Alexis towards him. Connor hadn't noticed our presence in the room so I cleared my throat. He looked up. "Connor, would you mind doing me a huge favor?" Connor grinned. Oh no. I knew what was coming now, a ridiculous request so all Connor's "hard work" wouldn't go unrewarded. 

     "Only if-" I stopped him there, crossing my arms and sending him a death glare. 

     "You'll give Alexis the tour of camp and you'll enjoy it." Connor opened his mouth to speak, before he could I interrupted. "Please?" He nodded grimly. Connor got up from his bed and led Alexis out of the cabin. When he passed me, he gave a wicked grin and said, "You so owe me." I followed them out of the cabin and picked up my search for Mavis. I looked in her cabin and when I didn't see her there I looked in all the cabins. Nothing. I continued to scour every possible place in camp for the rest of the night. With no luck, I returned to the Big House. I sit on the floor near Lance's bed, leaning back on it. "What am I going to do?" I whispered. Annabeth raised her head and looked over me. I practically screamed at the sight of her, I had no idea she was awake.

     "About what?" Annabeth's voice was quiet and scratchy. I quickly stood.

     "Mavis is missing." I said it to my feet, I didn't have the heart to look Annabeth in the face. When I finally lifted my head, I saw Annabeth scrambling out of her bed. I rushed over to her. "Annabeth! What are you doing?" She had untangled herself from the layers of blankets and attempted to stand. I held her elbows to steady her. Annabeth's eyes were wild with fear.

     "Where have you looked?"

     "Annabeth, please-"

     "Where have you looked?!" She screamed it at me, waking Lance and probably the rest of camp. Tears streamed down my face. This is all your fault. All you ever do is hurt people. I let go of Annabeth, forcing her to sit back down on the bed. I paced in front of the doorway, covering my ears and crying. I couldn't keep my thoughts quiet. They raged inside my head, blaming me like I knew they should. "Starr?" Annabeth looked at me, tears of her own trailing down her cheeks. Tell her, tell her about how you did nothing to save your dad. How you did nothing to save her or Mavis. How you put her boyfriend in danger, how you killed so many half-bloods. Even if they were rebels, they were still half-bloods. They had families of their own, families who will never see their faces again, never hear their voices. Tell her! I pushed my hands into my ears, shutting my eyes tight. Stop crying, you have no right. You've only known Mavis for a few months. How long has Annabeth known her? How long have all the campers known her? Losing her would hurt them more then it would ever hurt you! You think you know pain? To you, pain is just a word. These people have lived pain. I leaned against the wall and slowly sunk to the floor. You evil person, you disgrace. You don't deserve happiness! Tears kept flowing down my face, I couldn't stop them. I couldn't stop myself from hurting people, I couldn't stop myself. Go on, tell Annabeth about all the horrible things you've done. You don't deserve such a friend. You don't deserve anyone.

     "Shut up!" I screamed, dropping my hands to cover my face instead of my ears. I couldn't let anyone see me like this. But, here they were, one of my best friends and my boyfriend watching me crumble to pieces, when I should be helping others. My thoughts continued to point out my flaws and all the bad things I've done. "Shut up, shut up, shut up!" I yelled it over and over again. Until my thoughts were nothing but a muted feeling of hatred for myself. And I was nothing but a killer.