The Outcasts | e.d

EIGHT

E T H A N

"You're worthless, it is your fault your brothers dead!" My moms been drinking again, actually I'm not sure when she isn't drinking. My dad hasn't come home for three days so she's created this illusion that he died too. I'm not sure how my sister handles my moms punches that she puts in the form of words. "I would rather have him here then you Cameron!" I heard Cameron slam the front door, making the entire house shake. I grabbed my jacket & beanie & walked out to find Cameron standing under the falling snow.

I walked up to her to see her deeply inhaling a cigarette. "You alright?" I asked as she handed me the cigarette. "Yeah, she's just in a mood again." I nodded my head in understanding. "So you've been hanging out with Elisa?" I shook my head, "you're pronouncing her name wrong." Cameron playfully rolled her eyes as she snatched the cigarette back. "What ever, you didn't answer my question." I shrugged my shoulders. "Yeah." Cameron made a face causing me to scrunch my eyebrows in confusion. "What's that face for?" Cameron chuckled. "She's too innocent for you. Your toxic energy will destroy her."

I scoffed and rubbed my hands together in a failed attempt to warm up my hands. "How are you doing in school?" Cameron's question caught me slightly off guard. She never asks me how schools going, for reasons I'm not quite sure. "It's going good, same half ass peers." Cameron dropped the cigarette on the ice and stomped on it. "Have you been going to your therapist, or is he too 'half-assed' for you too?" I sighed as I put my hands in my pockets. "You know, I can handle it myself." I turned away from my sister & began kicking the snow on the ground. "You didn't answer my question-" i interrupted when I said, "Jesus Christ, maybe cause it's none of your business Cameron." Cameron's face looked undisturbed, almost bored. After a years worth of "I don't love you anymore!" & "I'd trade you for Grayson in a heartbeat!" she became rock solid, as calm as possible when being told shit. "So long as you are my brother, and I am your sister, your business will always be mine. You haven't been going have you?" One look, and Cameron was able to see through my jack ass facade.

"You gotta go E." I scoffed and crouched down, leaning on the chain link fence. "The guys an ass who thinks I blame myself for gray's death." Cameron crossed her arms as she said, "well do you?" I stood up quickly and let out an aggravated sigh. "Of course I do! I'm the one who taped him to the door to make that stupid ass video & I'm the one who left the candle on! I am the reason Grayson isn't here! Shit, I'm the reason mom yells at you all the time." I began pacing up and down our short section of the sidewalk. When I faced Cameron her face looked the same as it always does, unfazed.

"You can't blame yourself forever Ethan. If you do that, you might as well just take a gun to your mouth & pull the trigger." I watched Cameron walk back inside with nothing left to say.

Well, she certainly isn't wrong.