Perfect scars

Chapter Nine.

The room started to feel smaller and I felt like I was in an insane asylum. I sat on the floor with my back against the cold wall which seemed to be my only comfort right now. Knowing that nothing could attack me from behind was slightly reassuring.

Time seemed to have stopped. Everything's felt slow too slow. As I sat here contemplating everything that didn't make any sense to me (so let's face it basically everything) my old friends are carrying on with life as if nothing happened people are still getting on with their lives nothing's changed except for me. Do my old friends even worry about where I am, what's happened to me?

What if this didn't happen and I was a normal student without demon's blood running through me and in constant battle within me. I thought about all the things that could happen, I could die, I could become stronger and more powerful or I could not change I could stay weak and useless and all of this would be for nothing apart from i would have lost everything.

*****

Hours passed and I started to feel like nothing was going to happen I pulled my knees up to my chest and cradled myself. How could I be so different and not even know about it. How can my whole life be a lie? I can't believe it, it's not fair! I just wanted to be normal.

But if I was normal I would be weak, pathetic and powerless...

Suddenly I felt my mind go white I can't describe the feeling... everything faded until I could focus on all the things around me as if I was blind until now. I stood up feeling shocked at this new skill I walked to the door and pushed it open slowly I looked around and there was no one here so I followed through to where I came from back to the main hall.

They both kneeled as if they were praying with their hands linked together and their heads resting on them. I suddenly felt awkward standing here watching them I looked around trying to find something to do.

"Scarlet please don't act so confused we are just praying you can wonder around if you like or I could have someone show you your room?" He asked standing so he was once again looking down one me I quickly spoke up "I thought other people couldn't stay here" I asked but he stayed quite ignoring the question.

"Can I see my room?" I asked and he nodded clicking his fingers and a man in black walked over and he smiled and gestured for me to follow him so I did.

We walked through the corridors again the walls towered over me with deadly patterns engraved into them. He soon stopped at a small door and opened it for me I stepped inside, the door was shut behind me as soon as I had stepped in. I looked around the room it was normal a double bed in the middle with two bedside tables a wardrobe to the left of me as I walked in and a desk in the far corner. Dark wood covered the floor and pale creams drenched the walls.

I quickly took off the black cloak I was wearing so I was once again in my training stuff that Oliver gave me. I tied my hair up and opened the door so I could look round.

Shutting the door behind me I started to look around the corridor. There wasn't anything out of the ordinary as far as the eye can see but I'm not sure what lay behind these doors.

I looked around until I reached a spiral stone stair case which I followed down to a room filled with punching bag target boards, human shaped targets, knives, guns, fitness equipment and combat clothing. I smiled as this was one of the main skills I wanted to learn, I want to fight and be strong I want to be an amazing assassin someone who everyone knows to be deadly. I want to be fearless I don't want to feel and I don't want to have to think... I want to kill. I want revenge for my family, for the life I could have had.

I stood in silence and walked towards the punching bags I ran my fingers over the rough leathers that surrounded them I made one smooth move and my fist made contact with the bag it swung back and forth slightly and I placed my other hand against it stopping it from swaying.

"you know you should tape your hands up first." I heard a manly voice behind me I nodded slowly... and turned to see Stephan standing there holding a knife "Why are you really here? What do you want?" He asked playing with the knife in-between each of his fingers effortlessly "I want to kill... I want to be dangerous and fearless, I need to kill..." I said truthfully, he smiled and nodded "perfect" he smiled playing with the knife still "don't move" I didn't have a chance to react to his words before I felt the blade rush past my face and a loud bang followed it I turned to see the knife which was once in his hands firmly planted into the punch bag behind me.

He shook his head slightly "your heart rate increased... you were scared in real life if someone's going to attack you they won't give you warning and being scared can be the difference between surviving and dying" he said calmly walking up to me and grabbing the knife from behind me pulling it out "you can be dangerous easily, being fearless is different. See fear comes with emotions and to be fearless means for most people they will lose their emotions for a while maybe even forever..." he said once again playing with the knife in his hand "so I won't feel?" I asked "in a way, you are not emotionally effected easily you are cold you don't feel happiness you don't feel guilt you don't feel remorse" he said I smile "that sounds good" I said happily "you also give up love" he said I knew he was referring to Oliver... I don't love him, do I? because I don't know him and I'd rather be strong and emotionless than weak and emotional.

The thought of him or the thought of losing him ran around my head. If I can't feel, I won't be in his way and I will be protecting him... I can't lie I have feelings for him and I'd rather not know what they are... yet.

"What do I need to do?" I asked he looked at me as if I wasn't sure. "You need to train on your accuracy with every weapon no matter how hard it is to wield" I nodded "but right now you need to sleep" he said pointing towards my room "I'm not tired I should train" i said I'm away of defiance but he simply kept his finger pointed to my room so I nodded and started walking back towards my room.

I finally reached my room and changed into some comfortable clothes. I sat on the bed and felt my eyes grow heavy. I leaned into my pillow and closed my eyes in the sinister silence which filled the room. I was soon engulfed by a dreamless sleep...