Benefits || Kyoya Ootori x Reader

Chapter 8: Karate

A few weeks pass by smoothly with Renge popping in at the weirdest times to do her "managing duties" and sometimes she's not around for days at a time. You're still hoping she will pack up and go back to France one day.

Besides that, you're handling your own personal inconveniences by taking it out in karate with Mori and Honey. You don't think it's anything serious, you have just been feeling completely off and agitated for a while, mostly toward Kyoya, but you're definitely okay with suppressing it until you can properly come to terms with your feelings.

You stroll into the dojo as you normally do while greeting the staff and other family members including Honey's little brother and Mori's little brother on the way. You approach where Mori and Honey are already sparring each other in their own space with minimal intentions of actually causing each other any damage.

"(Y/N)!" Honey yells and runs over to hug your waist.

"Hey, Guys," you greet, hugging Honey in return and patting his head.

"Would you like to spar today, (Y/N)?" Mori questions.

"No, I just want to work on my kicks with the dummy. I have some pent up anger I need to take out on something," you reply truthfully.

"We can have cake later if you want," Honey offers.

"Maybe."

You smile and walk over to the row of dummies that only have an upper body while the rest is a black pole balanced on the ground. You straighten your white karategi and take a proper stance before swinging your leg up to strike the side of the dummy. You let your mind and body go on its own accord.

How could I have gotten to this place of uncertainty? I had my plans all spread out in front of me and now I'm falling under this weight of... I'm not even sure. If I had to guess I would say I like Kyoya. For some screwed up reason, I like that--Well, he is really good-looking and is actually incredibly generous under his stupid egotistical facade.

You recoil. No, dammit. He's too focused on his future and surpassing his eldest brother to even be bothered with. There's absolutely no point in considering... Why am I even thinking about this? I do think of Kyoya as a friend, but he doesn't see me as his and certainly not more.

"Uh, (Y/N)?"

You spin around and land another hard kick to the dummy's head before stopping and turning to Mori and Honey staring at you in bewilderment.

"What?" you ask cluelessly, now realizing your breathing is quite heavy.

"Mitsukuni, why don't you go get a treat," Mori suggests.

Honey nods wordlessly and skips out of the dojo, leaving you alone with the tall, normally silent man. You brush a strand of hair from your face and even out your breaths.

"Something you want to talk about?" Mori questions.

"Why?"

Mori sighs and sits cross-legged on the mats. "You were going pretty crazy on that dummy. You seem way more aggressive."

You let out a quiet groan before joining him on the floor. "You're right. I feel completely lost right now and I don't know what to do."

"I'm listening."

Mori has been one of the closest out of the guys to you because he's so willing to listen without judgement and he's also incredibly fun to be around. People who aren't his friends don't see that side of him.

"I think I like this guy, but I don't see how because he's sort of an asshole, yet I know he's actually a good person on the inside. He doesn't particularly show interest toward me, but there's something about him I can't stop thinking about. It's ludicrous to think anything could happen between us but these emotions are bubbling up inside and are bursting to come out, making me want to vomit all the time," you rush, finally able to express your pent up desires of the last few weeks.

Mori looks taken aback by your confession and his face contorts to one of confusion, then to realization.

"Are you talking about... Kyoya?"

"That's it. I'm killing myself," you conclude, rising to your feet.

"(Y/N)--" Mori stands "--it's okay."

"Tell me one thing, how is it so obvious? I might as well scream it to his face!" you exclaim in frustration.

"It's only obvious because you explained it to me. I would have never guessed from the way you two act around each other."

"It's so much more embarrassing when someone else knows! I hate the human brain. I don't want these feelings, but my brain is projecting them with these electronical waves to my chest. Kyoya and I don't mix together at all and would never be able to work out whatsoever--"

"Why?" Mori interrupts.

"Because I'm not good enough for him," you blurt out and slap a hand over your mouth.

Mori's brows crease in concern. "How so?"

You throw your arms in the air. "I know your family isn't extremely traditional, but most high-class families are, especially the Ootoris. They are the richest family in Japan with the biggest company and you think that the possible heir to all of that would be able to be with a 'commoner' like me? I have nothing to offer and Kyoya's father would never allow--if we developed some type of relationship--us to be acquainted. It would ruin Kyoya's future."

"You have really thought this through," he comments and puts a finger to his chin. "Maybe you're in deeper than you think."

"Maybe," you mumble. "There just isn't any way for it to work, therefore I cannot dwell on it so profusely. I'm not exactly clear on the way the Ootori family plans out each of their kids' future or whatever, but I know Kyoya isn't going to risk that for someone like me."

"You're willing to risk your own happiness for Kyoya to achieve what he wants most in life?" Mori inquires to make sure he's following this correctly.

"Yeah, I guess." You shrug your shoulders.

"You're in too deep for this to go away. When people hold onto their feelings so strongly and justify every reason for letting go of someone they want, it's because somewhere inside of them, they still have hope," Mori educates. "You still want this to work out somehow."

"Humans are selfish creatures and crave the things that will benefit them in some way, even in happiness. I can't resist human nature," you reply logically.

Mori makes a sound, almost like an amused snort, before turning his back to you and walking toward the exit of the dojo.

"What the hell was that noise supposed to mean?" you demand.

"It's nothing," he assures. "It's just... that sounds like exactly something Kyoya would say."