Action Figure

Part 2

There was a lot of white, crumpled confetti. That was good, really, a good sign to be well-packaged. Gingerly, I parted the white sea and wrapped my hand around a cool, firm, dark object. I took a deep breath and pulled.

Confetti went everywhere, a small package fell out, and I was holding little-Andy in my hand! He was perfect. He had to be, what, just over a foot tall? Feeling self-conscious at his raised eyebrow, I set him down.

"Hi?" I felt like I should make sure he was ok after being shipped, but for some reason, I felt like it was rude to stare. Feeling ridiculous, I decided to apologize as I looked him over. Whatever, no one would ever know I had talked to a figurine.

"I'm, uh, sorry, just making sure you're alright." Little-Andy had really long legs! Oh my god, and such a cute butt! Turning red, I immediately put him back down. I could have sworn his eyes twinkled through the stone...

Feeling mortified at getting a lady-boner over a statuette, not to mention talking to it, I decided to try and come back to Earth. I sought out the instructions. They turned out to be in the little package I had displaced earlier.

Hmmm... 'Don't get wet...' I wondered what would happen if you fed him after midnight, and chuckled to myself. They suggested gluing him to his pedestal, and had provided a tube of glue in the packet.

I looked at little-Andy. "You don't strike me as the type of guy that wants to be glued to your pedestal. So is that for my protection or yours?" Little-Andy, unsurprisingly, refrained from comment, just held his pose, eyebrow raised in challenge. Hmmm. "Alright, just don't fall off the shelf, ok?" Good thing I didn't have any pets.

Suddenly, I felt exhausted. The endorphins had given out. My golden idol had arrived safely for veneration, and I needed to get him tucked away safely. Nothing like the weekend for a nap.

I cautiously carried little-Andy and his pedestal to my bedroom, setting them up in the central spot I'd cleared for him on the shelf in my bookcase. "Night." I switched the lights off, indulging myself in silly, girly thoughts of Andy.