platonic empathy • atsukyo fanfic •

vii. reminder

    🐯🌸REMINDER🌸🐯        

Atsushi felt he was a totally beaten up in his state, lying in the bed without having any idea that Kyoka was sitting, a chair facing the bed.

She was waiting for his eyes to wake up. Atsushi opened his eyes into consciousness, it was slow and Kyoka's slumped shoulders had turned upright, her eyes had regained light and the side of her mouth had curled upward involuntarily.

Atsushi knew that it happened again for the second time. Him being unconscious and her, waiting for him to wake up in his slumber. His gaze was directed towards the ceiling, measly aware of the presence of Kyoka in his side. Sleepy, his eyes were trying to close and just rest but his running thoughts couldn't leave him alone, and he was letting it roam in his mind.

His thoughts couldn't sit in one thought to another. It kept on shifting, unidentifiable if it belonged to either for the sake of keeping himself safe or hers from the collateral damage that one's decision could make. What if she can't sleep in a house where no one stays? Maybe she changed her mind, I mean she could find someone. Find someone more family like. That someone who could stay, stay for her and stay for them.

It was probably the effect of flu, spreading negative thoughts in his system but he couldn't just stopped himself from doing so. Being bedridden made him more useless than ever now that there was someone waiting for him at home. He couldn't afford to spend the night somewhere else, it was his promise and his duty.

While Atsushi was being drowned by his own private thoughts, Kyoka could not bring herself to make her presence known. Atsushi's vacant gaze towards the ceiling was something that she didnt want to bother. Though it felt like a mere gaze, but it seemed his brows being furrowed together had hinted that there was something in his mind but Kyoka didnt know what it is despite of her curiosity.

There were still things that Kyoka didn't know of Atsushi in fact both of them were clueless to each other. She knew that someday they will come to terms of understanding, an understanding that was grown and will be reaped because of the time they had spent together. Nothing had happened yet, no memories to carve in her mind but she knew she will. As long as they stay true to each other, being understanding and no one gives up, that's it.

Left.

He always found himself looking at the left, though it was purely hunch, something he thought that maybe someone will be there, waiting. He didn't know since when did he developed this habit. It was strange, really strange. With Kyoka Izumi, bizzare things kept on happening. If Atsushi could order things he would likely to expect for a'day to turn out, it was unlikely, very unlikely for her to wait there. In that spot. That day too. It seemed ages had passed by but it was just a day.

A day that felt like years - did time passed that fast?

Time was something that always tick slowly for Atsushi. So slow that probably his routine has become monotonic - unchanging, constant and undisturbed. Not until Dazai-san and Kunikida-san, the Agency...and Kyoka Izumi had barged in his life.

Kyoka Izumi.

A name that will forever stored in his mind. Unchanging? Probably not, something that can prompt change. An unexpected intersection in his life. Since when did he started to think such profound thoughts like this? Bizarre things kept on happening on him. The early negative thoughts had died down - replaced with thoughts of wondering.

His eyes roamed for a long time in her face, the same solemn and stoic face but her eyes - her eyes had spoke different language than her face.

Relief.