platonic empathy • atsukyo fanfic •

viii. turn of fate

"My decision about Kyoka Izumi is final and irrevocable."

            ATSUSHI took a deep breaths, letting every air enter his lungs, filling it up like a balloon close to burst from excessive air  then letting out in a big puff - came out as a sigh and nothing could compare his nervousness in that moment, he couldn't quite grasp why Kyoka can hold such emotions within her. 

           Everything seemed so close. The wind blowing from the window, the clammy hands clasped in his own hands, the chapped lips and dry throat - he couldn't sit still. 

          It was like waiting for the wheel of fate to stop in the right turn. 

         He didn't knew that fate loves to play games with him so often. 

🐯🌸 F A T E 🌸🐯

The sun has started to set replacing the sky from the blue hue and turning it into orange color of the dusk - saying goodbye to yesterday. Dusting their minds of another uncertainty of tomorrow, but the promise of something new awaits them in a brand new day. Despite clouding their determination that fate may intervene, accepting it will be the best option to deal with it. 

None of them were making a move from their seats minutes ago, they remained there looking into the window, seeing the view of the sunset. It was really strange for Atsushi, to be comforted of silence. Silence has always been an unbearable enemy to him, whispering into his mind of darkness and prompting him to just give up in life but  it never even occurred to him that this silence, together with someone would comfort him.  

The Director left already, right after his decision leaving the two of them to their own thoughts but not even single of them attempted to use it as a subject of their discussion. In fact, they were wordless. No words could actually express their feeling. 

Atsushi, after minutes of silence has faced Kyoka who was still solemnly looking in the sky outside, turning into darker tone as minutes went by. 

He looked at her face, studying it carefully. Atsushi couldn't find any sign of change, nothing could beat her poker face - he smiled at the thought. She was amazing in her own ways, Kyoka was. A surprise that no one can decipher. Something kept on reeling within him though, looking at Kyoka.

Feeling that someone was looking intently to her, Kyoka turned her head to the side, Atsushi was looking to her which she found strange. As she was opening her mouth to speak up, Atsushi suddenly enveloped her into a hug. 

It was nothing compared to the impulsive act he made then, this was a product of relief. 

If Atsushi could associate Kyoka's name to any word, it would be relief. Despite of everything that Kyoka brought with her, everything about her just spelled the word tragedy and sadness but something that was so opposite like relief was something that Atsushi felt with her. 

Relief because of her presence, relief because...just because. 

"Fate heard our prayers I guess," he whispered in the most quietest voice he could ever say while tightening his grip to her shoulder. She wanted to say it was suffocating her due to her shoulders being clumped together but she endured it not wanting to disturb his happiness but not too long Atsushi broke free and smiled at her, warming but of them inside.  

"Why are you crying now? You should have done that earlier!" 

The laughter of Atsushi was reverberating the room, replacing the solemnity of something light in the chest. But it died down as Atsushi noticed Kyouka looking intently in her lap, seeing still the tears falling from her cheeks, he wryly smile at her.