Make Me

»forgiveness

[grab your popcorn and tissues this will be a long ride]

***

One month later.

"Stiles you are late, again, as always. Where are you?" I told Stiles through my phone and I could practically imagine him rolling his eyes.

"Just wait, I know that you like Netflix and chill a lot but my penis can't handle you,"

I gagged and heard him laugh on the phone,
"Whatever, come, or else I'll start eating popcorn myself."

The call ended and I sighed. One month ago I was broken. One month after I am still broken but I found Stiles. A person who mend my heart and soul back together. The person who is the only one I could trust to give my heart to, I just hope that he will never break it.

My mind went back to Allison, her doe eyes and her angular face. The way dimples will form and how she will laugh at any small joke I make. But now she's somewhere in the grave with her father and becoming something that I'll never dare to imagine; dead. Soulless. Unhuman. Rotten. Tears started swelling my eyes, and blurring my vision. I could feel another panic attack and I took a deep breath, counting backwards from 10 to 1:

10.
9.
8.
7.
6.
5.
4.
3.
2.
1.

My breathing eased and I took a deep breath. Allison died in a car crash, she was apparently drunk with her new friends and she violently crashed into a tree on her way home at 5 am. At first I hated her, hated her for changing and becoming this wild, uncontrollable person who I don't even know anymore. It was selfish of me to hate her, but what could I do at first when you realize that your friend dies because of her own mistakes in life? I remember my speech in her dull, lifeless funeral: where only some people-and Scott- from our school were but it was mostly her relatives from France and Germany.

"Allison. Allison Argent, who is she to me? I see her as a beautiful rose, full of color and spikes. She can close herself to the rest of the world but she will always keep her petals open to me. I knew her as my sister, the person w-who loved me even for all the mistakes that I have done in my life. She was the most liveliest person that I have ever known, she made mistakes, she forgave and she continued; I could never do that.

But what people did to her is that they judged her, for every little thing she did. They didn't realize that sometimes, words fucking hurt. They called her names and the next day she will come back with a smile but I knew her; she was breaking inside, trying to hide her tears behind the mascara and fake smiles. I even didn't notice that she wasn't fine past these two months, and I'm sorry Allison. I know that it won't change anything, b-but I miss you and you'll forever be known as the most magnificent, wonderful rose that I have ever known in my entire life."

I finished my speech and when I looked at the crowd, everybody had tears in their eyes; maybe they didn't because my eyes were a bit blurry from my tears but I didn't remember the rest. I was numb, for weeks. But Stiles helped me, he threw me a rope to help me out of my hole that I buried myself into and told me that it will be find someday, everything will be okay. And I believe him. I don't see Allison as a rotting body anymore, I see her as a soldier, who didn't give up, but still fought even if shit was thrown in her way.

A knock in the door made me come back into real life and I shook my head, trying to push back the memories away. I opened the door and found Stiles beaming at me. I smiled at him and told him that I accidentally ate all of the popcorn because he was a late piece of shit. I got laughter as my response and I flipped him off.

"I don't need popcorn Lyds, I need you to dress up because we are going somewhere," he wiggled his eyebrows at him and my jaw dropped, was he actually telling me to dress up because we are going somewhere?

"Okay look Stiles, as much as I trust you-which is not that much by the way- for all I know is that you can still be a psycho murder who wants to kill me somewhere deep in the woods," he raised his left eyebrows and told me that he's giving me 15 minutes to get ready.

"Make me," I smirked and he rolled his eyes at me. Since I didn't know where the hell we were going I put on a casual red dress which fitted my hair since they were strawberry red; which mind me, is not easy to match with any clothes. I applied minimal of makeup and took my purse as I made my way downstairs.

I could feel his eyes on me, following my every move. I always felt uncomfortable whenever I am near him, he was so flawless and perfect but I am ugly and far from imperfect perfection. He held out his hand to me when I reached the last step and I gladly took it since my high heels were 5 inches long and I was on the verge of falling ungracefully.

He hugged me to his side tightly and I leaned my head on his broad shoulders. I felt safe when I was near him.

"You look beautiful baby," he told me and I hid my face on the crook of his neck, trying to hide my flushed cheeks. In the process, I tried to take in his cologne and smell, peppermint mixed with sweat.

"I can say the same thing to you," I said and he chuckled as he gently took my head into his hands and gazed at my eyes. I lost into his chocolate ones, he's just so beautiful.

I closed my eyes, tilted my head a bit and went in to kiss him. He smiled and kissed me back. When we were done, he took my small hand into his strong one and lead me towards the door. I was still blushing from the kiss and looked down at my feet while smiling like an idiot.

As I looked back to my house, checking if I forgot anything and repeating the same words over and over and over again in my head:

I am happy. I am happy. I am happy.

fin

***

okay okay okay wtf it ended and im actually crying. thank you guys so much, thank you
for dbekkali always supporting my story
even if it was shit some times. an after note
will be written after this chapter so be sure to
read it :)

i love all of you so fucking much,
be happy & never stop smiling.

shah