I'm A Bad Mother (BWWM)

17.Never

Nate P.O.V

I looked over to Cas as I drove us to some nice place to eat dinner. The woman is amazing, after all of this I couldn't feel fear in her. All I could feel was her anger, and damn it was a lot of anger the rain was beating down on the car.

"You need to calm down." I said making her look at me.

"I am calm." She said back to me.

"Yeah that's why its raining so hard your going to cause a flood." I said and she looked.

"I can't help myself, and I can't help this anger in me either. This woman took away my childhood, took away my father and my memories. I ran away from home based on nothing but lies and struggled for years because of her. I ran away at 12, and started stripping at 17, never had a home, never made friends, lived in ran down house. I couldn't even finish school because of her, so no I can't calm down. I want her head on a tray, I want her to begging me for mercy and still not get." She said making the rain ease up a little.

I felt bad for her and I hated her feeling this way and I hated feeling it. I had to talk to her about myself, maybe if she discovered I'm not perfect maybe that would help. I pulled over to the side of the road and turned off the car. She looked at me confused and I took a deep breath for what I was going to say.

"I use to hate my mother." I said and she looked at me more confused.

"Bull crap, you love being around her." She said making me chuckle.

"Yeah I love being around her now but I wasn't always that way, I hated her. I was the boy with the hooker mom, and everyone knew that. She slept with most of the Alphas and all the teenage boys knew about her. I never wanted to be seen with her, and when someone would make disgusting jokes about her I would just leave. I remember her wanting to do the son and mother dance with me at school. I told her they cancelled it and took my aunt in her place. She found out it was still on and she was me there with my aunt having fun." I said ashamed of myself still.

Cas didn't say anything just looked at me with a slight look of disgust. I hated her looking at me like that but she should for what I did to a sweet woman.

"I remember coming home and all I could hear was her crying. I could feel her emotions but I just pushed them away. I though if she didn't want to be treated like a hooker, then she should have been a hooker. I never wanted her to take me to school so one day I walked to school, and was attacked. I had to be about 13 at the time and I wasn't the strong you see before you back then. I was attacked by 5 rouge wolves and I knew I was going to die. I shifted and tried to fight but I was losing. My two back legs were broken, my eyes was filling with blood and she came to save me." I said not noticing I was crying.

I felt Cas hand touch my arm but I shuck it off not want the comfort from her, I wasn't worth it.

"She came and fought off all five of them for me. She was bleed to death in front of me, and  I knew she was going to die. One of her front legs, and one of her back legs broken, her right eye ripped out of its socket, the left side of he stomach split on. She was willing to die for a little piece of shit that hated her. All I could do was cry as loud as I could to get help and after maybe 20 minutes my father showed up. I remember looking at her and her breath was so slow and all I could do was cry. I though she was going to die and over me, I not worth her dying over." I said clenching the wheel.

"She's your mother, every mother should be willing to die for there child." Cas said and I laughed.

"She should have just let me die on the street that day because how I treated her. Cas maybe you have a fucked up mother but don't let that break you. I wish I could say something was torn for me, so I could sleep at night. She gave me so much that I didn't notice as a child, and all I could see was a hooker. I know she never forgot, when I met you she asked me if she could meet you. She didn't want to be an embarrassment in front of my new mate, and everything about that hurts me. I when I saw you as a stripper I hated it, but I never though less of you because of it." I said and I looked at her threw blurry eyes and noticed she was crying as well.

"I don't see a stripper, of a wolf, a mother of nature I just see you and I damn I love it. I don't want to ever make you feel the way I made her feel. I don't want you to just seat around angry over what this woman did to you. I promise you, we will have you head for what she did to you and James. I wont ever let anyone get away with making you fell like less than the princess, queen and Luna you are." I said as she moved over to me.

She wrapped her arms around my neck giving me a hug and softly kissing my cheek. I looked down at her as she move up some and softly planted her lips on mine.