Highland Chieftain (Book 5)

Chapter 33

Chapter 33

Kendrick was not quick enough. It was like a dreamscape which turned into a nightmarish hell. He was too far away, had spotted her too late. He should have known to look here, he should have known from all the years he had watched her that this would be the spot she chose. How could he not have known? Pushing himself faster, knowing that no matter how much his lungs burned, how much his legs propelled him forward, he was not fast enough, was not good enough. She had not been here when he had arrived, he had foolishly thought that she would come to find him. That if she had no by the morning he would hunt her down. He had never expected this of her, never would he had ever imagined the image before him of Larena standing upon the parapet wall. All of these thoughts ran through his mind in a fraction of a second.

He had barely reached the top of the staircase, losing her from view for but a moment, when he saw her take a step closer to the edge. His voice slipped free from him, even knowing he could do nothing to stop the actions she took. He was still too far from her. His heart froze as he heard the single word leave his lips. "Larena..." His heart broke into the tiniest of fragments as she turned towards him, before she disappeared from view over the parapet with her eyes locked upon his. He stumbled to a stop, breath caught on a sob in his throat.

Yet, he was unable to click into place the actions that were happening with the devastating scene he had just seen. "Kendrick, what are you just standing there for? Get over here and help me." Kendrick shook his head and truly took in the scene, a dreadful relief flooding his body as he hurried over to Cam, wanting to see what he hoped and yet, he could not believe this. Cam leaned over the parapet reaching. "Larena, I swear I will beat you for doing this to me. You are my sister, now hold on." Kendrick snapped back to the full present at that moment. Springing into action, leaning over the parapet wall, reaching forward as he saw Cam had seemingly come from nowhere and caught Larena's hand and arm as she had gone over the edge.

How he had not seen such was beyond him, but he had not been concentrating on the shadows, but the woman who he had seen disappearing from view. A scene that would haunt him for the rest of the days of his life. The guilt was eating at him, even as he tried to catch Larena's other hand his own to help lift her back to safety. For she was still in such danger from the heights she hung over. With nothing in the way to break her fall. Yet, every time he went to grab her in some way, she batted his hands away, her voice not making sound as the sobs wracked her body. Cam was screaming for her to help him help her. That she needed to take Kendrick's hand, but she only shook her head with wide pleading eyes.

It was a movement of a split second. But the very moment he found purchase in his contact, he started to pull along with Cam and it was a long second later that Larena came down hard on the correct side of the parapet. Kendrick went to pull her into an embrace, but he was beaten too it by Cam. Who, he saw, was weeping for the first time that Kendrick could ever recall. This man had been a rock throughout their entire friendship, to see him crumble so and over a sister that most would believe he had no real care for, was both bewildering and pleasing to see. Both of them collapsing to their knees upon the parapet walk.

Camdyn was struck still by the fear which had taken over his being. The tears he could not stop, that was a pointless task, but the fear was morphing to anger, it was the only one of the two he knew how to deal with. Crushing Larena to his chest, he could not help but think on what could have happened if he had been on a second later. She had nearly slipped from his grip as it was. Looking up to the stars above, he sent a silent prayer to the Lord Almighty. Not only for him being able to save his sister's life, but also for the vision from his wife which had sent him searching the parapet for the reason for her upset.

Rocking back and forth a little, one arm wrapped firmly around Larena's waist, the other came up to stroke over the back of her head. He murmured words, which even he found unintelligible. Until Larena finally complained at the tightness of his hold. Pushing at his chest as she complained something about the ability to breathe. But as he loosened his hold it was not to let her go, it was so that he could take her face between both of his hands, holding her in place as she squirmed. He looked over her familiar face with his eyes, seeing as if for the first time the darkness of the circles beneath her eyes, the slight hollowness to her cheeks. Even in the flickering flame of the nearby torch it was obvious that she was not the woman that he remembered her being. Did he really not see her anymore? When had he last truly looked at her? Talked with her? Had he really been so derelict in his duty as brother and Laird that one of his people, his sister, thought that putting her soul into eternal damnation was the way to relieve herself of her suffering upon earth?

"You will not ever do such a thing again. Do you hear me?" He shook her a little, trying to make her see what she was doing to him. "Larena? Are you listening? What do you think you were doing Lass?" Unable to resist and still getting no answer from her, he pulled her back into his embrace. Lowering his voice, as men were arriving now, trying to find out what the commotion was about. Leaving Kendrick to deal with them, as his friend pushed himself up from where he sat against the wall, he concentrated instead upon his trembling sister. "Larena, what can I do for ye lass?" She only shook her head against his chest, unable or unwilling to speak of her inner most thoughts. "I promise no judgement, you are a beloved sister."

Larena could not help but respond to that last comment. "You have no need to lie to me Camdyn." She pushed once more at his chest, trying to rise, but she might has well have been pushing at the stone wall for all the effect she had. Looking up in the darkness, she saw the furrowed brow in the dancing torch light. "Larena, what do you think I lie about?" He reached up to brush a lock of hair out of her face before she could do it for herself. But her shaking limbs were making any such actions a little difficult. It came from nowhere, the trembling, and she could not stop herself as she let the shock and knowledge of what could have happened settle within her. "I know you lie?"

Cam held her tightly, the fear of the night was having an adverse effect upon her, it was already chill and now her skin was freezing to the touch. "Lie about what?" Keep her talking, it was partly the thought that had him continue the conversation. The other part was that he was in fact interested in what she thought he lied about. Her whispered response stabbed him to the core. "I am neither beloved, nor you sister." When she pushed at his chest once more, he had no strength to hold on, the words she said rattled around in his mind. Why would she think such things? She did not manage to put more than a few inches between them, but it seemed enough for her. "Why would you say such Larena?" His voice made practically no sound, yet he knew she had heard, or at least guessed correctly at his words.

She looked away, out over the bailey where the drunken revelry still continued, the warriors who were on guard had moved back to position and only Kendrick stood within hearing distance now. Larena wondered on how they could be so ignorant of the pain going on so very close to them and yet they would completely oblivious to it. She could not bring herself to care if he heard her next words or not. "I know Camdyn, I have known for years now that you are not my brother by blood." She paused and looked back into her 'brother's' eyes. "But you are my brother by marriage." She saw his eyes widen and knew the truth from their depths, until that moment she had not really believed even as she had heard it with her own ears. This was the confirmation of the lie her life had been. "Aye, Camdyn, I know that truth, but I also know how you long to be rid of me and have been for most of my life. I know I was a terror," she forged on even as he was about to interrupt, she did not let him. "I was awful to the people you have sworn to protect, but I have had my own pains and hardly any have recognised those. So, I say you lie when you call me beloved sister." She looked at her hands a moment and then back up to a silent Camdyn, "I also say, if you refute what I have said, you are lying to yourself. There is hardly any amongst the clan that can bear to be in my presence. So I ask why you would stop me from ridding this clan of the problem it no longer needs."

It was then Kendrick could not keep quiet any longer, the shock of Larena's actions, the rescue and now this revelation was too much to stay his tongue upon. The pain he was hearing in her voice broke what was left of him. "Larena, you are so dearly loved. In fact those that love you have more right than anyone to tell you how wrong you are at times, even if I agree that Cam could have been more brotherly with you."

Her head swung in his direction violently, her eyes spitting fire and he almost smiled. If she was angry with him, then she was fighting and whilst she was fighting she was alive to be so. "Do you not have a wife somewhere looking for you? I am sure she is incredibly worried where her husband has disappeared too during their celebration feast." Kendrick furrowed his own brow and looked to Cam as if wanting to find the correct words. All he knew what to say was the truth.

"Larena, I am not married."