Best Friend's Brother: Chapter One

I Love You

Nathaniel and I were sitting in his car since the arcade was going to close soon. We didn't say anything; the radio was quietly playing Roses by Shawn Mendes. I softly sang along with the chorus, "I'm not trying 'na start a fire, with this flame, but I'm worried that your heart might feel the same, and I have to be honest with you baby tell me If I'm wrong, and this is crazy, but I got you this rose, and I need to know will you let it die or let it grow?"

"You have a beautiful voice," Nathaniel whispered as he turned to look at me. 

"Thank you," I whispered back with a laugh laced in my words. We returned to our comfortable silence, and I leaned back on the seat. It had been a few minutes, and the song changed to Supermarket Flowers by Ed Sheeran.

"A heart that's been broke is a heart that's been loved..."

My heart broke, and I turned to look at Nathaniel, who was looking at me.

"Was that note really for Matt?" Nathaniel blurted out.

"What?"

"The note. The one Summer found in your bag. Was it really for Matt?"

"Oh, that one..." I looked at the clock, and it read 9:32. I swallowed, trying to find my words. My heart started racing, and I felt as if I were about to puke. "No..." I spoke softly, like if I was doing an ASMR video, "it wasn't originally for him..."

Nathaniel visibly relaxed and took a deep breath, "Who was it for then?"

I looked away from him, not wanting to see his reaction. "It was for-"

The side doors suddenly opened, and I jumped from the sudden noise.

"Hey, guys!" Hannah and Autumn jumped in the backseat and shoved their heads between the front two seats, blocking my view of Nathaniel.

"Oh, hey guys," I tried to sound enthusiastic, but it didn't work because Hannah immediately started asking questions.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I'm fine," I smiled.

Hannah frowned and gave me a look, "No, you're not. What's wrong?"

"I don't want to talk about it," I flickered my gaze at Nathaniel but mainly remained on Hannah and Autumn.

"Did I do something?"

"I said I don't want to talk about it."

"I'm sorry if I did something wrong; you know I don't mean to. I just-"

"Hannah!" I yelled, causing her to jump. I rarely ever yell, especially at her and Katie, "I said I do not want to talk about it."

Hannah shrunk back in her seat, and Autumn gave me a 'what-the-hell-Jess' look of disapproval. I rolled my eyes, "I'm going to see where Melody and Katie are." I got out of the car, slamming the door behind me. I heard another car door close as I got to the curb.

"Hang on, Jess." I took my hand away from the door to the arcade and moved to the side. I turned around to see Autumn standing behind me. "What happened there? You kinda exploded on Hannah for no reason." She crossed her arms across her chest like a mother scolding a child.

"That's the only way to get it through her head that I don't want to talk." I crossed my arms, quietly reminding myself that I actually care about this person's well being.

"I've told her tons of times that I don't want to talk about something and never once have I had to raise my voice at her," Autumn gave me the scolding mom tone and disappointed look.

"You're also not nearly as close to her as I am." Autumn dropped her tough act when I said that; as if she had taken offense. "She can't sense that something is wrong with you just by looking in your eyes. She hasn't been through all-nighters with you where you are so high off no sleep that you couldn't keep anything from her. She hasn't made stupid videos with you because you had a rough day. She has never seen you so sick that you were puking up stomach acid because even that upset your stomach. She has never seen you so emotional because of the death of a book or movie character. She has never seen you, Autumn." 

Her eyes were glistening in the light from the arcade. "She has never seen who you really are; I have gotten to know that person you are when your parents don't want to beat the living shit out of each other, but you and Hannah prance around like you have been through birth together.

"We're not just field friends, Autumn. You're one of my best friends, but lately, you've really been acting like an Alyssa. It had nothing to do with Hannah when I yelled okay? I was about to confess to Nathaniel, then you two prance into shot and I completely lose it because it's my two best friends who don't even have time for me anymore but have all the time in the world for each other!" I took a deep breath to regain my composure. Autumn was silent for a little bit and kept her head tilted down so I couldn't see her eyes. She played with her fingers as she thought.

"Is that really how you feel?" She whispered, still not looking up but I saw a tear drip from her face. I grabbed one of her hands in mine and pulled her into a hug as her body began to shake. I heard another car door slam shut and looked over her shoulder to see Katie standing with an apologetic yet empathetic smile on her face.

"I'm sorry," Autumn sobbed into my chest.

"Hush," I cooed in her ear. She pulled away from me and wiped her tears from her face. I gave her hand a tight squeeze. We walked back to the car, and Katie rolled down her window as Autumn jumped in the back seat.

Katie put her hand on my arm as I leaned on the window, "Melody is asleep in your car; yes, I locked it. Here are your keys," she whispered, placing my keys in my open palm.

"You, my friend, are a saint and I love you." I reached in the car and gave her a tight half hug. I let go and started walking back to my car.

I heard a car door slam as I reached my car and turned to see Nathaniel had gotten out of his car and run over to mine. I leaned against my door as he stood in front of me. I gazed into his eyes as he scanned my face.

"I really need to tell you something," he said without breaking my gaze.

"Cool, because I really need to tell you something too." Nathaniel shoved his hands in his pockets and rocked on his heels.

"You go first." I rubbed my nose and waited for his response.

He was quiet for a moment and looked down at his feet. He cleared his throat, took a deep breath, and looked up at me to meet my eyes once again.

"I..." He paused, having to pull himself together once again, "I love you."

I froze in place as my brain tried to register what he said. I pushed off my car and put my hands on his shoulders. His hands made their way to my waist.

As he pulled me closer to him, I grabbed the collar of his shirt and smashed my lips to his. He backed us up against my car as our mouths danced together in harmony. 

I pulled away and rested my forehead on his, "I love you too."