Monstrous Love

Chapter Twenty-six

Chapter Twenty-six

I don't know what to do.

I don't know how to feel.

I don't know what to think.

All I know is hate him.

I hate him so much. I want him to suffer.

He has to pay.

I can't stop reading all those news reports online, flicking through the comments people have been leaving about what should happen to the killer.

The whole world wants him dead.

Their families want him to pay.

Which means Niall is never coming out of prison if he's caught.

I'll never see him again.

I wake up each night, calling out his name and soaking my pillow with tears.

My entire body hurts, screaming out for the one who can make this right.

The one I should despise more than anyone.

Except I don't...

This is what I can't come to terms with.

Why don't I hate him?

I should want Niall to pay for what he's done and spend the rest of his life in jail.

Except I don't...

I hate myself for it but can't deny it anymore. I can't keep lying to myself when it hurts so badly, destroying me each day.

I've kept my curtains closed, my door locked and phone switched off since Niall's confession. I've reverted back to what I know and chose isolation over facing my fears.

Except I can't keep on running.

I must make a decision.

One I'm going to live with for the rest of my life.

The question is... am I capable?