Monstrous Love

Chapter Twenty-seven

Chapter Twenty-seven

Niall

Dear, Evie...

It sounds like such a cliché when I say this is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. However, I thought it was the right time to respond to one of those notes you used to leave me.

The truth is... I can live off those few days we spent together if I have to. I can cherish those memories and they will make sure I survive.

My childhood was a dark and lonely place before you entered it. You captured my heart in a matter of seconds and I loved you from the first moment I saw you.

I never stopped.

You somehow heal what has been broken inside of me for so long. You somehow fix the part I can't fix myself.

I don't blame you for anything you said and know I've put you in an impossible situation. I know you can't have phoned the police by now because I've not yet been arrested.

Again, I don't blame you if you decide this is what you need to do. I want you to do what is right for you and put yourself above anything you might have once felt for me.

I killed us. I ruined what we had and I take full responsibility for that. I accept whatever is coming my way and will not be a coward. I will not take any more lives, including my own.

I will face the consequences.

I don't want you to be involved and I don't want anyone to think badly of you for what you now know. I'm going to hand myself in and free you from the responsibility of making that phone call.

I never deserved you and you certainly deserve better then myself. I want you to be happy. I want you to find completion... no matter what that entails.

I want you to be free.

Live a good life, Evie.

I want you to find peace and leave the past behind you. I want you to realise that you can be anything you want in this world and stop hiding, stop isolating yourself and move forward.

I was holding you back but I won't do that anymore. You found me and brought my life new meaning. I will never regret those weeks I spent with you, loving you and cherishing each moment with the girl I've always loved.

I have come to terms with the fact that you no longer feel this way about me. I destroyed the love you gave me and must live with that for the rest of my life.

This letter is my goodbye to you. This is me telling you that everything is going to be ok. This is me letting you go and asking you to do the same.

Be happy, Evie. Find peace and seek comfort in the fact that you changed me.

You brought me back to life and I will always be grateful for that.

You are my world but I don't deserve to be in yours. I was a chapter in your life but you have to let go now and complete your story.

Make it a happy ending.

I love you forever, Niall xx

I can't read my letter once I've finished it, knowing it will tear my apart completely.

All I have to do now is post it.

I need to say goodbye.