Jan. 5th 2014
HII! We have school tomorrow, someone hand me a gun!! I don't wanna go. I really wish I was good looking. Then i would be semi excited but finals are here and they punched me in the face hard. I'm so scared. I'm listening to the Neighbourhood and they are perfect! I don't really find it okay when people say their music is bad. You just got to have an open mind with music. Then this music is so beautiful. So I found myself thinking a lot more about 2014. I'm so excited yet frightened on what we might run into. 2013 was a spectacular beginning then September came and everything kinda went downhill. I wish I could rewind and still remember what has happened so I could fix all mistakes but I think I wouldn't be writing so… I mean sure. I don't know i ditched writing this for like an hour oops. Anyways, I found myself reading My Wattpad story on here and I really like it. aha, kinda reminds me of what i used to want. A boy in my life. I'm single and it gets kinda lonely. I have been craving it now that i think about it more and more. I am not really interested in anyone right now maybe because i don't socialize a lot but i have claimed for that to change and so far its not really happening but if it did. It wouldn't change anything because guys at my school are quite picky and judge a lot which sucks because I might now have a body to offer or a face but I do offer….a listener….advice. love even if gets to that point. I don't do drugs or drink. So i don't get why they just stare and instantly push that button that says " NOT INTRESTED" It's not always about looks you know!! I mean yes every instinct for everyone and including me is 'EW HE IS UGLY' or " OMG HE IS SO HOT" or it could be a she if you are a guy or if you are a girl who likes the same sex, not a big deal. anyways you shouldn't push that button. Put it away and open your eyes to explore. WHAT IF THE PERSON OF YOUR DREAMS HAVE BEEN SITTING BEHIND YOU IN MATH, ENGLISH or even running by you at P.E?? I know I would say hi most likely if I had the courage too. I look at people sometimes and think…ew. Oh man…i remember that one time I was with 2 of my friends at school and the new kid ran by and I instantly said " Ew you see that loser!" I said something like that but anyways i said " Ew you see that loser? He is zoo annoying!" God I felt bad. I could probably say the only thing that was word vomit was the first sentence. I didn't mean to sound that harsh but now that he is in my english. I don't talk to him but he is different which i have learned to respect. Now I just look back and think to myself " What the hell is wrong with me?? I am so mean!" That is one of the reason I am kinda go a bit restricted this year. Still be social but its going to be hard to crack my shell to know things about me. You have to be really close to me. And thats why I am staying anonymous on here for a while if you don't mind.
