My Dearest, [ Alexander Hamilton | Reader ]

• Chapter Nine •

...

Cold.

Oh, how very cold it was.

[Your Name] found her eyes slowly opening, squinting at the immediate light of wherever she was placed. It was white, everything was white. She turned her head from what she assumed was a mattress, medical supplies surrounded her. Pain shot through her shoulder.

Her [Eye color] eyes widened, she knew very well where she was. It became a struggle to properly breathe, her hand trembled in fear for what would happen. Would she dare look the other way?

No, she was prolonging the inevitable. She slowly turned her head, meeting a rather stressed Alexander sitting on a chair. He covered his face with his hands, his hair was messy. He'd not seen her wake, she was terrified.

[Your Name] looked beneath the covers, she wore nothing but the bandages and trousers. It was just as suspected, she knew what fate had before her. She knew it'd happened eventually. She had the chance to go back when she was at Alexander's house, she'd long passed the point of no return.

Alexander let a sigh of frustration, lifting his head from his hands. Her breath hitched, heart racing in fear. He caught sight of her lying beneath the covers in a panicked state. His warm brown orbs held bags underneath them, his eyes bloodshot. It was the worst she'd seen him, it seemed he'd not gone to bed in weeks.

"What were you thinking?"

He broke the silence, his tone holding a mixture of emotions. Those standing out consisted of anger, concern, and fear. Her gaze fell to the ground, she was silent.

"Tell me, what were you thinking? Going through with this? What were you hoping to achieve with this?"

[Your Name] didn't dare look up at his face. She wouldn't. She couldn't. She inhaled deeply, her breaths shaky as she prepared herself to speak to him. Her throat felt dry, a lump forming in it. She was never one to hide or endure emotions.

"I... I-I want to make sure you were safe... I didn't think-- I didn't know it'd go to this extent."

Her voice was quiet, almost a whisper, it was difficult to speak. It was as if she'd not spoken for years.

"Keep me safe? Look at yourself, you got shot... You were unconscious for two days, do you know how worried I was! Even with this Jeremiah character, I was still worried!"

Alexander's voice was raised, his hands balled into fist trembling. This man had been through so much, this stress sent him spiraling.

"You could've been killed! Fatally shot! What would I have done? What would I have done knowing that a dear friend of mine had died and I didn't know?"

She tried, she truly did make an attempt to hold the walls up to prevent her emotions from escaping. Her vision became clouded, the beads of water fell one after the other. She placed a shaky hand upon her mouth, in an attempt to muffle her sobs. It was to no avail.

She knew she looked weak, she knew she was weak. The British soldiers she managed to kill or injure did not matter for it was not her who did that. She merely pulled the trigger, she was only the servant to the weapon. The true harm was the weapon, she was nothing more than an accomplice.

[Your Name] found Alexander staring, his eyes showing no a sign of sympathy. She wouldn't blame him, she betrayed his trust. He simply stared at her crying state, he stood from the chair.

"You'll not be imprisoned, you've been commanded to leave this camp and speak not a word of what has occurred here... I am to accompany you making sure you get to where you need to be, safely."

He sternly spoke, eyes searching the tent for something. Eventually, he reached for a vest and coat, the ones she wore. He set them beside her before leaving, shutting the tents curtains.

"Get dressed, we're set to depart soon."

She sat herself up on the edge of the mattress, reaching for the clothes. They'd been washed, cleared of her own blood. She quickly dressed herself, wiping her face of the still falling tears.

She allowed her feet to hang onto the cold ground, it'd be a great challenge to walk. She did indeed feel lightheaded as she sat on the mattress. She looked over finding her wound wrapped, it was painful but not as it was before becoming unconscious.

Her hand grabbed a hold of the mattress for support as she lifted herself from it. It was as suspected, her legs shook violently. She was far from graceful, her struggles resembling a foal attempting to walk its first steps.

[Your Name] reached forward to the bed frame, taking a step forward. Needless to say, it was a terrible attempt. Her knees bent forward causing her to nearly lose balance which she would've if not for the bed frame. She heavily sighed, sitting herself back onto the edge of the mattress. Her eyes narrowed at the floor, she attempted once more.

Walking gradually became easier, knees became less shaky. She grinned in accomplishment, running her hands through her hair. The tents opened revealing Alexander, the same expression on his face. It was cold, almost bitter.

"The carriage is here..."

It was all he said before leaving once more, she slowly lifted herself from the mattress. She quietly exited the tent, Alexander stood outside. She observed her surroundings, soldiers eyes were fixated on her. She felt uncomfortable, her posture falling.

Alexander began moving forward, she followed closely like a lost dog. She felt hundreds of eyes still fixated on her, they followed her every move. Snow crunched beneath her boots, they neared a carriage.

It'd be a tedious ride.

...

[ I'm honestly on a roll, 900 or more words written! This'll be released on my payday so hey! Got money to last me this week! Hope you all had a great holiday or break! ]

Chapter finished- December 24th