Not a Diary ➳ LS

Entry Seven

Entry Seven:

Okay. It's been around a week, I know, and I haven't had time to write.

To be fair, I've also been avoiding the journal, as I was before my prior entry. I don't want to accidentally let someone see that I have a journal, that and Im embarrassed of what's been inscribed in it.

It isn't going well.

All of my feelings are welled up inside of me. This journal is like a way of going over what I am thinking about and have it arranged and help me speculate in a way. It's my metaphorical rock. You know, the kind that you can lean on for support and reach out to when your troubled. Not a literal, like, natural rock. Im confusing myself with the "rock" so I'm just going to stop right there.

Anyway, describing what's going on, on paper is a lot less chaotic than going through it in your head.

Eleanor still hasn't given Louis an answer, which means she's both killing Louis AND myself with suspense.

He's acting weird lately. I asked him what was wrong and he muttered a 'nothing', but hasn't really spoken to me since.

Louis always tells me what's going on. Always. When his parents got divorced, when the band lost singing competitions, when Lottie got her first boyfriend and he was afraid he wouldn't need him anymore, when he and Hannah broke up, when the fans called him gay, when his favorite character died on his favorite TV show, when he and Liam were having a fight and many, many times previous and more recently, he's told me every detail. Every thought he's had. Every possible solution, and everything that could backfire. All of the effects. How it changed him. Freaking everything.

And now I have to just believe it's "nothing"??

Why is he acting like this? What's wrong with my best friend? Did I do something? Did I say something?

... Did I write something?

-Harry x