Jungkook's Heart - Taekook

two.

Bewildered by the emotional chaos he just went through, Jungkook went to his pier. Although he'd planned to go early and get a head start on the pile of work awaiting him, his shift didn't actually start for another hour at 9 AM, and he just needed some time for himself. He walked slowly through the streets, occasionally sipping on his peppermint latté. He smiled a melancholy smile at the memory of his ex-girlfriend who used to absolutely loathe this habit: of drinking beverages slowly. She would constantly nag him to finish his drink. She didn't understand why he took so long. Him drinking so slowly drove her crazy. He wouldn't understand why it bugged her so much, it was his drink, why did she care so much? He loved to savour whatever drink it was, to taste the aroma and inhale the smell, to make it last as long as possible.

She was beautiful. And crazy about him. And was a nice person. Despite his habits which really drove her mad (and her clinical anxiety which made it harder to deal with), he could tell she really loved him.

He thought he loved her too.

Why not? They were a very nice couple. Everyone said so.

But however much he tried to love her, he could just feel that he didn't completely reciprocate her feelings. It broke his heart.

He didn't know what to do about it. He was scared. So he just stayed. He convinced himself he really loved her. Maybe it really was love. Maybe he just didn't like love as much as others did.

Who says everyone has to like being in love?

He reached the pier with these thoughts still racing through his head. He sat down on the old, damp, mossy wood that creaked as his weight shifted. It was a small pier, just ten steps long and only wide enough for three people to sit next to each other. It was hidden in the small, abandoned forest which started at the end of the town. It was hidden among the big muscular branches of the ancient grandfather trees, the leaves dark green, the trunks dark brown and twisted. All the gigantic and dark trees, each one similar but unique in their own way, gave the place a mysterious feeling. He guessed it must've been abandoned a long time ago. He liked to ponder on what the place was used for, when it was built, which people stepped on it to leave or arrive. What laughter the pier saw. What sorrow. Which stories were held, kept hidden inside the fibers of the wood and the dark brown moist soil, never to be revealed.

The fresh, salty air and the gentle wind in his face was an escape from reality. Ever since he was nine, he would run here to solve, or to forget, his problems. Staring into the horizon. The waves crashing into the side of pier, the clear water foaming at the tip of the waves, big or small.

Watching the sun set. Watching the sun rise. Watching and listening to the birds chirp. Sometimes if he was lucky, he'd see shoals of fish swimming in unison through the clean, transparent water, so in sync and at peace.

He draped his legs over the end of the pier and lay backwards. Stared at the blue sky, clouds tainting the colour like squid ink in water. In swirls, and unrecognizable but pretty shapes that eventually change and dissipate. He closed his eyes.

He jolted up in shock at the image that he saw when he closed his eyes. He had almost forgotten about him, but his image wormed its way back into his mind, almost like it tattooed itself on the inside of his eyelid.

What was so special about this coffee shop guy? Why did he keep thinking of him?

He shook his head vigorously. No. He was a guy. He was a guy. It was okay. He'd heard of same-sex crushes, like you have on celebrities. Doesn't mean anything, just means you think they look attractive. Nothing else. This was normal.

Plus, he was sleep deprived.

It was the absence of sleep.

It was messing with his brain.

Too stricken and confused, Jungkook couldn't think of anything but this handsome guy with green highlighted hair, and the usually comforting silence and isolation started to all squeeze and press down on him to the point where he couldn't take it. He couldn't seem to breathe in this wide open space, everything started to close down on him. He needed a distraction, something which would take his mind off the guy.

He decided those extra files would be taken care of early, after all.